A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I met my third cousin last April, she is from US and Im from our hometown here in Asia. At first, we respect each other and just hand around and keep each other company for she dont know someone from here so it is me, the only person who can get her to places. She lived next to our house (to my grandmas) and there we talked a lot after my work or anytime we have a chance. Im 20 by the way and she is 19. The thing is that we got closer to each other that we dont realize that we are falling for each other until that day that we kissed about 6 weeks after she got here. The kiss was unexpectedly the most perfect and incredible of all and I dont have doubts about what i have done and i even dont feel sorry that i might be just over reacting about things or taking advantage on her part. We have this chemistry that is really unexplainable. It is like that we know each other for a very long time now and still wanting more. After that kiss, we talked about it and we knew that it was all wrong if thinking about our relatives would be the reason. But after 2 days when we got together again, we just cant help it.. i hold her hand and I just can feel that she is not against it and now were kissing again and it's just that maybe we just dont want to talk about the problem but instead nurture the feeling that we both are feeling. But then, now.. i dont want to open things up about this anymore, im just happy that she is around and she is not changing at all. We are still the same. I respect her so much that i cant even think about having much more intimate attraction with her. Hugs and kisses is something that i do right now to show my affection and expressing what i really feel.What I want to do: try things between us and just dont think about the problem for now if it is not there yet but the moment we are together i know it is a problem but yet im still being positive and im hoping that she'll be too.Reason for being scared: Our families are very much close to each other and I am a Christian.Question: What should I do to gain more strength on keeping us together. What are the chances that her family will accept things about us? My part of the family is quite open about things like these so there will be no problem on my side. But what do you think about her side? Am I doing the right thing not talking about "us" for now and just letting things happen for OUR reason and not thinking about THEIR reason? Is OUR happiness good enough to be the reason for US being together?Thank you in advance...
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female
reader, aphexinfinite  +, writes (24 May 2009):
 well for a start im not sure about your culture but in the uk it is legal to be with a third or second cousin so their should be no legal boundrys their as for your famillies if you were closer related they might have concerns but because your not then perhaps they wont be to angry or odd about it. if you love your family and they love you then you can overcome this you say your christian then stick to your beliefs be open and honest. if i were you i would question each other is this what we want is it a short term thing or will it last and if yes then tell your famallies the worst they wont accept it you live together and see were life takes you. you hide it and your famallies find out and are hurt because you ddnt tell them. either way their will be somewat and unhappy response but i feel the best bet is to tell them if they love you enough then they will understand. and also be very happy for you both. good luck aphex xx
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