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I love my older sister. Her boyfriend is nice. I just don't like them together!

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Question - (24 September 2010) 2 Answers - (Newest, 24 September 2010)
A female United States age 51-59, *ugar1973us writes:

Dear Cupid,

I love my older sister. Her boyfriend is nice. I just don't like them together! My relationship becomes strained with my sister when she gets into a relationship. Towards me she becomes more bossy, manipulative, arrogant, and insecure. She doesn't do it to my older siblings. I feel like her emotions overwhelm me sometimes. Why would something that's supposed to be so great bring out these qualities in her? Between relationsips, she's much nicer and easier to communicate with. I've brought it up to her, but she thinks I'm trying to sabotage her or downplay her happiness. Is this typical for siblings? Thanks

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A female reader, sugar1973us United States +, writes (24 September 2010):

sugar1973us is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks. I agree that my attitude is important, but how does this help my relationship with her? I feel like what you say is making it okay for her to treat me that way.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2010):

What's not typical is your response to her. It doesn't matter if you like her BF, you need to be civil and courteous.

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