A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My husband and I have been married for almost 2 years. Before we got married, the sex was great, but now I'm lucky if we make love once or twice a month. I've tried talking to him about this, but he always wants it to be all on his terms. Sometimes I wonder if he's taking care of his needs elsewhere, but I don't have any proof of that. I love him, but am tired of feeling so un-satisfied. What should I do? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2008): Hey, thanks for the advice. I don't see this getting any better quickly, but I appretiate the ideas on how to get it fixed.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2008): TALK TO HIM. communication in a marriage is very important. If you have done that, or tried that without any success, I think you should suggest to him that you go for couple counseling. I cannot stress enough how important it is that you talk to him and tell him how you feel. He needs to know how unhappy and unsatisfied you are; he needs to know that you are wondering where else his needs are being fulfilled. His lack of libido might be due to numerous factors and issues, but the two of you need to talk about this and take all the necessary steps from there. A medical examination for him to establish his overall health etc. He might be over worked, stressed, be on medication, lots of things that could have an effect on his libido, but you need to get to the root of the problem.
Medical examination and counseling is what I suggest.
I know it might not be easy to convince him, but you need to make it very clear how you feel and that if he wants to save the marriage there is no other options.
Good luck. Keep us posted.
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