A
male
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*luey
writes: Hello There, I am 20, and have been going out with a girl for nearly a year now. At first it really was amazing for me. I had never dreamed that I could ever meet a girl who liked me who was so beautiful, because I'm really not a good looking guy, and I'd never had a girlfriend before. In the supsequent months we grw closer and closer and I lost my virginity to her. I was definatly falling in love with her. Another couple of weeks in we openly shared our feelings for each other and all was well. Now my life seems to be planned out. I am at university studying to be a mental health nurse (bit ironic), and when my girlfriend and I talk about the far future its always involves me, her, kids a house, my career, etc, which on the face of it is fine because I can 't really see my future without this girl.However, I've been getting really anxious recently. I feel like I gone from nothing: being a virgin all through my teens, not knowing what the hell to do with my life, all the way to having a really intense and loving relationship, a career and the whole shebang, within the space of a year!!!I like I want to experience things a bit more, and to put it bluntly, to experience girls a bit more. I feel so torn inside because I can't see life without her, but nor can I she it with her, in the near future at least. I'd be really grateful for any advice.Can I just add that I've been in a psychiatric hospital with post traumatic stress disorder and genral anxiety disorder (2004) and she's really helped out so I've a lot to thank her for.thanks
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2006): I am in the same situation that you are in. I'm 21 and am currently in a relationship with my boyfriend since january. I'm very much in love with him and he loves me as well. However, he's my first boyfriend EVER and he's had at least 6 girlfriends in the past. I'm also a virgin, he's not. It's so difficult to for me to imagine my life without him, yet at the same time i haven't experienced anything except him. I sometimes wonder if things do work out for us in the long run (marriage and such) would i ever regret not going out with other guys and seeing what that's like. I try to take this day by day since i am still young and not pressure myself into thinking i need to make a decision right now. I also figure that if i'm truly truly in love with this man, i wouldn't feel the want or need to experience any other guy because he's everything i already need and i would be complete.
A
male
reader, Lostandalone +, writes (11 September 2006):
I don't get it??? In the last sentence of the second paragraph you said you can't see your future without her but by the fourth you can't. Quick change. If thats the way you feel then fine. You have to let it be known to her that you want to see other people or at least you're moving a little to fast right now. You are still young and will meet other women that intrigue you. You have the grass may be greener on the other side syndrome. Take some time and explore your options but you have to remember that when you do this expect her to do the same and more than likely you will find out that everything you wanted you already had and by this time there might not be any room for you in her life as she WILL find someone new. This is the chance you take and every man, woman and child has to live with the consequences of their own decisions.
I'm not talking you out of what you want to do but I just want you to be aware of the reprecussions. Good Luck with whatever you decide.
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A
male
reader, Abacadaba +, writes (11 September 2006):
you say you want to experience different things? why not try something different with your current girl? if you love her so much, what else do you expect to find by going out and seeing other women? i realse relationships can get repetative and go from the fun to the norm, but its up to you too keep it interesting, think to yourself, if you did leave your current girl, would you actually end up losing what you wanted and kicking yourself for it? if i was you, i would stick with her
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