A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:help!! im in love with a girl that is pregnant with another mans baby what do i do? i really love this girl i dont want to lose her i am cofused any kind of advice will help! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (3 January 2011):
 Thank you for your follow up. It partially answers some issues, but throws up new variables.
Does your follow up hint at one variable? Is this the opposite of what your original question?
Do you suspect that the baby could be your baby? Or is she not certain of the dates - so she is not sure if the baby is your baby or his baby?
Is she living nearby - so that you can speak to her? And is she living with her family or with the other guy? I can see that both you and the girl must be in a state of turmoil. If she lives with her family then they will have more influence on her. Whereas if she lives with the other guy, and potentially he thinks he is the father, then the other guy will have more influence on her.
Is there any suggestion that the other guy will not support her?
Whereas if the other guy is supporting her (especially if she suspects the baby is not his) then she will be doubly concerned at the reaction of the other guy.
Do not do anything hasty. At this stage her age has not been stated. Is she in your age group, or older? Or younger?
There are many variables that still impact on how this will play out.
Do not do anything that would compromise her, as she should not have any sort of upsetting drama to deal with at this time. Especially as she already has a huge internal conflict to deal with. Certainly say nothing to the other guy. It may be his baby. And he may be willing to assist her. Or not?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionyou see she is a long time freind i hav grown quite fond of her she cheated on her boyfriend with me and she feels she has to be with him because she pregnant and has no one to help her how do i tell her i love her and i wil help her with her baby
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2011): well how does she feel about you versus how does she feel about the guy whose child she is carrying?
are you worried she will marry him?
or, did she cheat on you and that's how she got pregnant so you're suffering the hurt and betrayal?
or is she committed to you already but you can't stand the thought of having a child in your life that's not yours?
what's the real issue here???
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (2 January 2011):
If you love her totally, completely and utterly then I can understand how distraught you must be feeling, if you sense she is slipping from you.
Can you talk to her about your feelings?
You're in love with her, but is she in love with you? You mention that you don't want to lose her. Is she dating you or the father of her child? It is difficult to give an accurate response without a little more
information. I will look out for your
followup, thx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2011): first figure out if she really loves you then figure out if you really love her. and if you guys really love eachother then nothing can hold your love back.
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