A
female
age
36-40,
*ady in distress
writes:My husband and i have been married 10 months, and the biggest problem so far in the relationship is our sex life. i love being sexually active but my husband is the opposite. sometimes we dont have sex in a week or more and when we finally do, he reaches orgasm just before i do, which really upsets me. I have climaxed a few times and the very few times were beautiful. The thing is, he tries so hard to keep going, he even cut down on his sugar 'cos he thought that was the problem.Does anyone have an idea how to get him riding for long and also how to stimulate him to never say no.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2008): we are married for 10 months to! anyway its the same thing hes never in the mood because his work is so stress full. I have gotten so frustrated that i think of divorce. I don't know what to do it leaves me so heart broken sometimes. we just need to be loved!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2008): I don't know what to tell you.I wish I did. I am having the same problem. I know he is not cheating. Us woman have intuitions about that. We just know. I love sex and not just sex with anyone, just him. In other words- if I can;t have sex with him, i don't want it. I want him to desire me and I'm always always always the one who annitiates it first. It hurts doesn't it. Have you tried talking with him about it?
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A
female
reader, lexilou +, writes (5 August 2008):
 We have different sex drives at different stages of life and men and women dont always peak at the same time. Let him know you would like more sex but dont pressure him, that is the fastest way to get less sex. As a compromise suggest that when he is in the mood he takes longer with you so you can achieve orgasm too. You could also try massage as a way to get him in the mood, or offer to act out a fantasy of his x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2008): As others have said, foreplay and oral sex is very important. My wife can have 3 to 5 orgasms when I give her oral sex. She normally has one more with intercourse. When I was younger, I used to orgaxm too fast sometimes. I would think of something really boring while we had intercourse (like work or a project), which made me last much longer. After she had her orgasm I would have to think of something really exciting to get aroused again(like I was having sex with some hot actress). She never knew that I did this until I told her one time. She thought it was funny and appreciated that I cared enough to make the effort to make her happy.
I don't know what to advise on how to make him more interested in sex. I never had to worry about that, as I would normally want sex multiple times a day when I was younger and much more than any woman who I was with. I have read about your problem many times on other boards, but haven't seen any answers that are that great. Do you try to initiate sex with him much? You can dress in something sexy at bedtime or in the morning on the weekends. You can try to give him oral to get him aroused. Jump on him and start kissing him passionately. That does it for me every time. It always did, no matter who I was dating at the time. Just start snogging him like you were a nympho. That can get me out of a depressed mood and erect and horny in a couple of minutes.
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A
female
reader, marmalade22  +, writes (5 August 2008):
 foreplay is your answer. see if he will oblige you with oral sex (which in my opinion has amazing results because it is so direct) and then intercourse. Oral sex performed on him correctly can make his pleasure last longer as well. Just always be kind in how you ask and use your imagination. good luck.
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