A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I don't know why I keep browsing pornography on the internet whenever I feel stress from school work. Is it normal for a girl to do so?
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2010): I am a woman and I do the same when I am stressed. It can be rather relaxing!! I have always viewed it as a lesuire activity, rather like Playsation, or swimming or whatever. I think it;s fine, as long as you are not 'over watching'!! Don't feel guilty !!- just relax and enjoy now and then and alos find other ways of de-stressing so porn is not the only way. Hope that helps. :o) Nxxx
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2010): i hope it relaxes you to do it.
Is there something specific that is stressing you? Can you talk that over with someone you respect and who you think is wise, AND that someone will respect your confidence, and not repeat your worry to someone else?
It is so hard to cope with stress if everything around you seems negative. And if you are a worrier it is so hard to be positive. And even worse if the reason you are stressed is because you are depressed - only the Doctor can assess if you are depressed. But if it is not as severe as that you might also try to focus one one positive thing amongst everything you face daily. For instance if traffic is heavy, noise is all around you, and you find you are feeling stressed, try to notice one positive thing. And really focus on it. So it might be a building that looks beautiful. Just recognising you are beautiful and healthy (oops that's 2 things) is a positive thing. Or the color someone is wearing that you like. Or a taste you like. Or a tree that looks healthy.Meditate on that one good thing for a few moments. The aim is to retrain your mind to focus on the positive occasionally, more and more, instead of the negative.
I am not so into music, but sometimes i do put on relaxing sounds, but just keep it a very low volume. Or listen to it for 30 minutes with my earphones where i will not be interrupted and close my eyes and listen. Sometimes i choose relaxing music from another culture, where the sounds are unfamiliar to me, just instruments, and that can be good. Or i listen to classical music at a low volume.
A nice thing to do for yourself is to purchase yourself a bunch of fresh flowers and put them in a vase in your room.
Other things that can relax me (and maybe you) include lots of deep breathing. Take a deep breath, hold it for 10 seconds, and release, then repeat all the above 10 more times. It will relax you.
Another relaxer is to close your eyes, lie down alone in a quiet area, alone, usually your bedroom just before you go to sleep, and where no one will interrupt you.. Now, one by one, tense one part of your body, only, at a time -hold it for 5 seconds, then release. Repeat each area 5 times. You start with your toes, then you feet. Then your calves, then your thighs. Then your fingers, your hands, arms, tummy etc. Last place is your forhead, where you raise your eye brows as far as you can, and hold it, then relax. It takes about 30 minutes to give every area attention, but it is a real relaxer.
A relaxing thing for me to do is go for a run, but i understand that in some cultures a woman cannot run in shorts and a top along the road. So that may not be an option for you.
One of my favorite relaxers is a long deep hot bath. But i realise some people only have access to showers.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2010): I dont think its a question of whether its approrpriate for your gender but rather why you feel the need? My guess is that it helps you relieve your stress and is your outlet....maybe because it presents you with a sort of fantasy and lets u take a break from life? Any activity be it exercise, drinking, or even video gaming after work can lead to bad addictions. Too much exercise especially and there is such a thing lol just dont make me pull up my medical records. Take my word. Because this habit can be dangerous and is linked to a stress related factor, which is work, you could develop a bad routine and also an unhealthy way of dealing with life because youre not effectively sitting down and analyzing the issues that surround your stress. For example, how does porn solve your issues? In what ways is a good? What ways is it bad? What is your plan in utilizing it to relieve stress and why, and most important, do you think it is best for yourself? Good luck.
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