A
female
age
30-35,
*ip_hoppin_bitch
writes:Can somebody help me? One of my guy friends just told me he liked me this thursday, and i asked him why he didn't tell me he liked me before, because he said he's had a crush on me for around two months now. He said that he wouldn't treat me the way he should, because he's not always a nice person. And he also told me that people would treat him awfully if we ever did go together, and that our less than a hundred student school wouldn't accept our relationship(it started in 2007, so we only have sophomores and freshmen,me a freshman, he is a sophomore), because i'm like the most unattractive, unpopular girl in our school. And he's afraid about how our relationship would turn out if nobody could accept our relationship, or how it would affect his focus on us would be if people treated him badly about him falling for me. What do i do, please, i like him he likes me. Any advice?!?!?
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2009): YES HE IS RIGHT! HE WOULD TREAT YOU BADLY! He already has by saying what he said. Basically he is saying you are out of his league and you're below his standards! He cares more what others would say, than how his words hurt you. As much as he has a crush on you, you are not who he wants to be seen with!
I'm sorry if my words are hurtful, but they are not my words they are his! I just want you to realize that this guy is a jerk!
I remember how it was back in junior high and high school (even though it was many, many, many, many years ago) I know how it feels to not be very popular, just on the outskirts of the crowd, almost invisible! Although everyone liked me as a person...I was not girlfriend material! And at time people (especially guys) would make cruel and hurtful comments. I remember when a hot popular guy would talk to me or just say hi, I would get so excited! I would go home and fantasize our wedding day!!!!
please prove this guy WRONG! You are not beneath him! Show him that He Does Not meet YOUR standards! As much as you want to be with him, let him know you are not interested. This can be an empowering move that can shape your relationships to come! DEMAND THE RESPECT YOU DESERVE! I went through the first 30 years of my life feeling lucky to have any guy that wanted me. When you go through life believing that, give off that vibe to men, they feel they can treat you like shit and you will take it! Learn to give off an air of confidence and control of your life! I garauntee you will come out ahead!
Good Luck! Be Confident!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2009): Oh, hippity-hop,...who said you were "like the most unattractive, unpopular girl in our school"? You said that...didn't you? Who else ever said that? Ok, he feels like he is "out of your league" or something and he is not liked. Is this really true..or something he just feels about himself? I think you both are feeling a lot of confusion and neither of you feel really at home or comfortable in this new school yet. Chances are not many other kids are either. But, you can all bring it together if you try and want to. I am sure the admin and teachers would like to see the school come together and have a sense of unity. It may be new, but that gives all of you a chance to start it off right...like "Founding Members"..eh? That is what you should work on. And why don't you talk this up, yourself? You are very articulate, so I know you are as good a candidate as anyone to be the "spokesperson". (smile) And "friend" can either join in or keep hugging the walls...which he may want to do. But, that is his problem. You can be friends, but you don't have to hug the walls with him...do you understand what I am saying, hon? Best wishes, "Founder"...Tom
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2009): if he does like you why would he tell you that he wouldn't treat you as you should be treated.people might treat him badly but he can tell them what he sees in you.you may think you are unattractive but this guy fancies you so what does that tell you.beauty is skin deep.is he ashamed of you.you may be unpopular with others in your school but after college you may never see any of them again,only takes a few years.be with people that like you for who you are not what you look like.be happy
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2009): dude, screw what people think, you like who you like.
people will learn to accept it sooner or later.
yeahh people will be shocked. but i am one of the prettiste people at my school and im dating a skater, which here is like social suicide. people freaked out at first, but they got used to it.wanna talk.
msn=[email address blocked]
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A
female
reader, bOy CrAzY;} +, writes (22 March 2009):
Honey if he really liked u he wouldn't care what other people think!! I know this cause I've been there! So u know what piss on him if he says that he's not going to treat u the way he should and u have to keep ur relatiounship a secret dump his ass and find someone who will respect u!!;).
Need any more advice just messege me!;)
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A
female
reader, AskMelissa +, writes (22 March 2009):
 I was once in the same situation as you! A guy who worries about what other people would think of him and you together is not a great guy. His real friends will be happy for him if he is happy. If you guys like eachother you should be able to go out. Dont worry about what other people think. Anymore questions just ask!
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