A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Met someone 2 wks before my weddinng and can't stop thinking of him. I have been having doubts about the wedding for 6 months but kept pushing them off as everyone has been working hard for this wedding. Been with my fiance for 4yrs and never once have I met anyone I would "consider" dating/leaving my fiance for until now. Problem is this guy lives in a diff. country so realistically I know better than to expect that this would work out, but I wouldn't mind trying. I'm so confused, is this guy a sign that I shouldn't get married or just wedding jitters? I feel so guilty because I can't stop thinking of him and being that the wedding is pretty much set I can't call it off. How can I stop thinking of this person and push those feelings aside?
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female
reader, Basschick  +, writes (24 August 2007):
 Call off the wedding. I don't think you're ready to be tied down even though you love your fiancee. Better to call it off now, than go through a divorce later. Much more costly and devastating in the long run. Perhaps the two of you could try living together for awhile before you walk down the isle and this will give you some time to clear your head and figure out if you belong together at all. Good luck.
A
female
reader, Nevalearn +, writes (24 August 2007):
I think you have two seperate issues here. I think most peolpe get a bit jittery before they get married. You are committing yourself to someone for life (hopefully). It is quite understandable and normal the way you are feeling. But remember this, just because you are getting married doesn't mean that you will never again be attracted to anyone else, so comes problem number 2. You must learn to deal with such feelings and respect the person you are with, and hopefully he will do the same for you.
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