| A
male
,
anonymous
writes: I am 18 years old and completely fell for this girl I work with, she was 20. When I first met her she had a boyfriend but he ended up cheating on her and she broke up with him. Well after they split we started hanging out and I let her know how I felt. She told me that she didn't want a relationiship right now because she couldn't trust anyone. Well we ending up having sex and she took my virginity. I knew going into it that we would never date but I kept holding on to hope that she would change her mind, but needless to say she didn't and still didn't want a relationship. We hooked up a few more times but she wanted to stop because she said I was getting to attatched and she wasn't ready for it. I don't know what to do because I like her so much and I dont know what to do to make her change her mind. She still flirts with me and we are still good friends but I can't stop thinking about how much I like her, possibly love her and it kills me when she flirts with other people at work. What do I do??
View related questions:
at work, broke up, flirt, I work with Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Brian +, writes (22 January 2006):
man, I know EXACTLY how you feel, having BEIGN there now... We dated for about 7 months, then, I had to go away for 2 over the summer. We stayed in contact, but, one day, she tells me in an EMAIL, that it's over.... And I'm tearing myself apart to one simple question... "WHY?" . Why would she end it? Why won't she give it another shot, etc etc. She claims she still loves me, but I really doubted it. So, I thought it over, and decided, that 5 months of trying to make it work, and showing how much I care did nothing ( like, she wouldn't even talk to me in person, only over IM's.. won't even answer my calls )it was time to move on. So, I stopped. I stopped telling her how I loved her, I stopped the letters, I stopped the messages, and I even stopped talking to her... Geuss what...? She came over one night, and we had a VERY pleaseant evening... But, I am still puzzled about something. She still won't talk to me in public . . Could it be that she enjoys all the attention from other men? And loves to have them "devote" and/or "obsess" over her? Or did I make her realize what she was missing? I'm not sure, but we talk a lot more on the phone, and SOMETIMES - if I'm lucky, back at the U. Of course I have many other questions I wish to be answered myself, such as, why she won;t/dosn't want to have a relationship with me, but, man, you need to move on. Stop "obsessing" over her, even ignore her a little bit, and she should begin to realize what is missing.... you! And if she want's someone who will be there for her, and show the atmost love and affection - she will know where to look... If not.. you need to just give up. She dosn't loe you, she won't love you, and your wasting your life on nothing. Hope this helps, and I hope things turn out... Now, to get back to my life. Remember, we're fighting the same battle here! You can email me anytime : [email address blocked]
Hang in there! Best of luck
-Brian
A
female
reader, Tinkz  +, writes (22 December 2005):
 My Angel, take it from a girls Perspective.
It hurts when you break up with someone that means alot to you, and the last thing she wants is to go through that again. Give her time, be there for her when she needs you when she needs a FRIEND.
Earn her trust, she has a reason for not wanting a relationship don't force one on her.
Once she realises what she wants and isn't afraid of getting hurt again then try to get with her.
Don't let the game play you, you need to play the game.
...............................
A
female
reader, kellyO  +, writes (22 December 2005):
 Hi dearie, my own advise is that u should forget about this girl. maybe if she realises u arent paying her much attention again, might be a waking up call for her if she really likes u.if not find someone who is willing to give her heart to you.
have fun with friends to take your mind off things.
merry xmas and a happy new year.
...............................
A
female
reader, mommyofthree +, writes (22 December 2005):
 She had her heart broken and at 20 she is ready to play the field a while before she risks that kind of pain again. You are 18 and were a virgin, so of course you have gotten attatched, that is to be somewhat expected. I feel like there is no way you can hurry her in to wanting a relationship, while it may be hard you may find that limiting contact with her may be your only way of getting these feelings to subside. Perhaps getting out and meeting new people will help to ease your pain. I hope you find a way to get over her, good luck.
...............................
|
