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female
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*ierra48
writes: I had sex with my best friends man and she found out about it.I told her it was a lie and that i never had sex with him.I dont want to keep hiding it from her so how do i tell her?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2007): I think you need to be honest and let her know even if it does cost you your friendship trust me after you let the truth out u will feel like a better person
A
female
reader, willywombat  +, writes (1 January 2007):
 Right when did you have sex with him? If it was when she was together with him, unless your friend has the biggest heart in the world you have pretty much stuffed up this friendship, because the chances are she will never forgive you. I would find it hard to forgive that kind of betaryal.
If this happened before they got together there may be a chance you can salvage this friendship.
Look, it is not about whether she has the right to know - she obviously has her suspiscions or she would not have asked- it is all about if you can live with yourself and the lie if you don't tell her.
How does living with this lie make you feel?
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A
female
reader, AngelofLove +, writes (1 January 2007):
 By denying that you have slepted with her boyfriend, you are continuing the lie.
You need to face the truth and be honest with your friend if you want her friendship at all.
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (31 December 2006):
 Gently.
You lied to her AND you slept with her boyfriend. So expect her to be angry... you betrayed her trust and your loyalty to her as a friend. I'd be pretty pissed too. But, to honor what is left of your friendship, you need to tell her before someone else (her boyfriend, perhaps?) tells her instead.
Sit her down and tell her "I haven't been completely honest with you.", tell her what happened and apologize. Then don't expect her to give you hugs or invite you to stay for dinner. If she doesn't want to talk to you for awhile, give her space... she'll need plenty of it. Maybe after two weeks (if she's still not talking to you) send her some flowers with a written apology note.
There's no way to tell her without her getting angry... if you want to tell her, you're just going to have to. My only advice is to be sensitive, but don't beat around the bush.
Good luck....
xxIndia
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