A
male
age
41-50,
*ritzel
writes:Me and my girlfriend have been together for over 2 years. she is 34 weeks pregnant. i recently left her because i have a problem with drugs. i'm getting treatment and still want to be part of her life as well as our babies. she dosen't want anything to do with me now. i want to stay with her. i know i've lost her trust and she is very upset and consernded about the babies well being. should i give her time and let her see that i'm getting the help and still want to be part of both thier lives. or should we go our seperate ways. i was going to propse to her on her birthday but now everything is so complicated. she doesn't want anyone to let me know when she is giving birth. or even tell me the baby is born. she will not even let me make contact with her
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female
reader, YummyMummy  +, writes (22 July 2007):
 We all get scared hunni, especially when we are going through a tough time. Get yourself clean and then try chatting to her again :)
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A
male
reader, fritzel +, writes (22 July 2007):
fritzel is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice. I'm just scared i'm going to lose the 2 people I love the most in my life
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A
female
reader, DIE-romantic. +, writes (22 July 2007):
 You left her at the wrong time here, and its understandable why shes angry at you, when she needed you most, she feels that you just abandoned her and your baby, and now you have lost her trust, yet i can see why you left, because you wanted to make a fresh start to look after the baby.. but maybe you could of talked to her about it and not just leave. She doesn't want you do to this again, let her see the improvement in you and giving up the drugs, make her see that she and the baby are all you need and want.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2007): Pleased to know your getting help with the drug problem so keep it up.Your lady has a baby to think about without added problems of a drug abuser,(hope that dont sound too harsh). For you to have any hope with this lady, you need to stay clean and show her over a period of time that you have stayed clean and are trustworthy of her and the baby. She needs to know that you are going to be the father her child can look up to, the partner she can rely on and know that you are going to put them first before everything, and this will take time ( which won't mean a couple of weeks - could be months)... even if your lady decides getting back together isn't a good idea - you still need to be clean and show your lady that you are and will be the devoted father this baby deserves. good luck and stay clean hun xx
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A
female
reader, YummyMummy +, writes (22 July 2007):
I would give her time hunni. Yes you are getting through a drug problem but you left her while pregnant. I would be worried for my babies wellbeing if my partner up and left me to deal with a drug problem.
It sounds like you are sorting the problem out and you know you are, but your girlfriend needs to see it for her own eyes, not just listen to words.
I would give her space and sort you out. Get off the drugs and get sorted so that you can support your child. Whether you get back with her or not your baby IS going to need his father.
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A
female
reader, baby doll  +, writes (22 July 2007):
 In one way i can see her point, in another she wants to protect your baby and herself. but i think the reason she is being this way is cause she doesn't want you to hurt her again, i think it fantastic that your getting the help you need with the drugs and if you want to show her that you really have changed and want back in there lives its going to take time, just let her know how much you care about her, when your pregnent little things mean alot send her flowers with a sorry card.
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