A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I used to be best friends with a girl who was deeply troubled. She got more depressed over time. I helped her so much, taking her to see a counciler, listening to all her problems, helping her solve them - the works. But back in January I just couldn't take it anymore. She would always dump her problems on me and expect me to deal with them. She would always talk about herself and never help me with anything. Eventually, I didn't have any time for me and found it hard to cope, so I called it quits. I told her I didn't want to be friends with her anymore. She's been fine since then, but I still feel connected to her. It's so weird to walk past someone in the corrider and not even catch their eye when you used to do everything together. I do want to be friends with her again, but I'm not sure what to do. I mean, if she lets me back in with she be depressed again? And how would we start? You can't just not talk to someone for 3 months and then suddenly be best friends with them! Also, I want people's opinion. Did I do a really bad thing, leaving her like that? I need help! Sorry for it being so long! Thanks x
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2009): Hi, i can relate to your issue from your friends point ov view. I also sufferd depression & i leant on my friends a lot & i am now realising that it strains friendships because i drain them or bring them down. I dont think your friend probably meant to drain you but you did what you needed to do. You can only give so much ov yourself. Talk to her. I have a friend who doesnt talk to me because i leant on him to much. It makes me sad. I wish he would talk to me again. Your friend may feel the same way. Tell her you miss her & you want to talk. Explain why you pulled away. If your friendship is true then it will mend with time. Goodluck!
A
female
reader, BabyPip.x +, writes (23 April 2009):
 I know completely what this is like I had a friend who I helped when she was depressed and she helped me sometimes, but then it started becoming to much so i tried to stay away as much as possible but i still found myself wanting her as a friend.
Start talking to her a little bit and ask her how she is everynow and then, then as soon as you feel ready you need to have a good heart to heart with her explain everything that happened, why you wanted to stay away she will understand how you felt. Then say how you miss being friends and spending time with each other, things won't go straight back to how they were, but you can build it up again. I did.
As for you leaving her like that, i wouldn't say it's a bad thing as you can't always think about others as you will end up being upset yourself. Maybe this was just what you needed, time away from her- a break. It could of also done her good aswell as she may have found someone else to talk to about her troubles.
Don't beat yourself up about it you didn't do anything wrong.
good luck with this. x
p.s.feel free to send a private message if you need anymore help.
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