A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:She has bI am in love with my best friend and i have told her. She said no to being in a relationship.I told her i cant be friends with someone i am attracted to and that we should stop seeing each but she refuses to go out of my lifeI know she is in love with me but for some reason she won't accept .When we meet physically the chemistry can't be avoided For exampleYesterday we went for steam bath and sauna..and she accepted to shower together and to shower her..the feeling was magical .there after we talked for hours..Any attempts to kiss , she blushes them off..i and i fobt want to push her.She calls me love, misses me, i have been her profile picture with a caption " my knight in shunning armour" for 2 weeks now , we cuddle , we enjoy each others company , and when i asked her if she is ever attracted to men..she was like she ain't sure...Is she really into me and is scared to commit, am i dreaming that she will one day be mine? FYI ..i am 32 female and she is 28 ...we have known each other for 16 years ...
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (9 November 2016):
 She refuses to get out off your life therefore you need to remove her from yours. Block her from being able to contact you and move on. If she comes to your house ignore the door. You have told her how you feel but she is not wanting a relationship with you. She likes the attention you give her but she is not ready for a commitment and she is not sure if she is attracted to you or not. Therefore you are the one that is going to get hurt here if you allow her to keep being present in your life. She will destroy you and leave you heart broken. If she wanted to be with you she would tell you. It is hard when a person doesn't love us back but I think with her you need to accept that she only wants you as a friend.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (8 November 2016):
 If she won't get out of your LIFE, you get out of hers. You block her, delete her and stop talking to her and seeing her. But my guess is you rather live in this denial stage where you think you can "make" her change her mind if ONLY you do XYZ. If you just wait around.
I get that you WANT this to end up with you two being a couple, but SHE doesn't. She might be BI, but she isn't looking for a same-sex relationship. At least NOT with you. She likes the attention, the cuddles - but she isn't looking to dating you. While she may not be "sure" about being into me, do you really think HOW she is treating you is the behavior of someone in love? Nope.
Take a break from her. Get your mind straight, SEE what's really going on. Get a little distance.
Also, JUST because you have a crush on her doesn't mean she OWES you to feel the same. And while she may like you a lot, doesn't mean she has the same level of romantic feelings for you.
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A
female
reader, Ivyblue  +, writes (8 November 2016):
 Sorry but this is not my idea of a best friend. Carrying on like this when she is more than aware of how you feel is self absorbed bullshit. It's cruel and she knows you are vulnerable to her games. Are you sure you really want her or you just want something you cant have? Aunty bimbim is right. You cant control what she does but you can control what you do- walk away. A real friend may not like it but should be respectful enough to understand it.
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (8 November 2016):
 She likes the attention that you give her.
You did the right thinking telling her that you can't be friends whilst you have feelings for her but you need to take that one step further and block her from your life until those feelings are gone. She won't let you forget her because she will miss the attention that you give her, but the linger you let her stay in your life, the more you'll end up hurt.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim +, writes (8 November 2016):
 If you have told her that you cannot be friends with somebody you are attracted to, but she wont get out of your life, there is no reason why you cant put her out of your life, or remove yourself from hers.
If you don't want to be friends then why cant you block her, refuse to meet up, not take phone calls, remove yourself from her life?
I don't understand what your problem is .... although, if you were a man and she behaved as she does with you, showers and cuddles etc but no kissing or sex I would call her a tease .... you don't have to tolerate that. Shut her off and find somebody who is interested in having a loving committed relationship with you.
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