A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I started at a new job a little over a year ago. I became immediately attracted to one of my co-workers. He was engaged as am I. Right before he got married, we slept together. I never even thought of cheating on my fiance of 4 years before I met my co-worker...it just happened. I haven't seen him since that night, and don't want to. My problem is, I feel Pandora's box has been opened and now I am infatuated a superior at my company. He flirts with me, we have been out together a few times for drinks but of course he is married w/ kids. The usual...marriage isn't working for them, they are more like roommates then spouses.The most we have ever done was hug. He flirts with me without shame one week, then the next week he treats me as if I am nothing special. He always dangles the carrot in front of me though..."maybe one day we can be together" I just want to sleep with him, I don't want anything else. Maybe I want him because he is so unattainable, but I can't stop thinking of him. I know I should let my feelings for him go, but if anyone can give me advice, I would appreciate it.
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female
reader, rockelle +, writes (16 November 2007):
 Obviously, there are some other issues that you need address. Things that are going on in your heart and in your mind.I do not think the attraction is that he is unattainable. Maybe it is an ego boost for you, you have someone elses man showing you attention like you are the best thing since sliced bread. Women in relationships need that sometimes. I could be wrong but it sounds like you are not getting what you need from your own man. You are engaged to someone so why not concentrate on why you and your fiance haven't gotten married after 4 years? Keep in mind that one day you will be the wife and how would you feel if the situation was reversed? I hope that when you see this guy you go in the other direction. If you accepted a marriage proposal then you want to be in a commited relationship with someone who loves you, right? This married co-worker can not give you what you are looking for so why waiste your time? Good luck and concentrate on the ggod thing that you have at home. (I am assuming that it is a good thing or wouldn't have accepted his proposal)
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