A
female
age
36-40,
*oisegirl
writes:I need advice. I am married, I have two kids and I am 9 weeks pregnant. My husband and I have been married for almost 3 years. I love my husband but I still love my ex. My ex still loves me. I want to be with my ex but I don't want to ruin the relationship my husband and I have. The only thing is I am not really happy. My husband and I hardly talk. We don't really know what to say to each other and it is difficult to carry on a conversation because we don't know what to talk about. We don't do anything together like going out on little dates or even to friends house. We don't do anything together at all. I just feel like we are not right for each other sometimes. I just want to be happy... but I don't want to make the wrong decision.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 February 2009): Get with your ex, you only live once. Talk about it with your husband first! Splitting up with him will affect your children but thousands of kids these days have two seperate families. You can't live unhappily - it will make your children unhappy too!
A
female
reader, lotus mama808 +, writes (22 February 2009):
 The wrong decision would to be to get back with your ex (which is an ex for a reason), without putting your all into your marriage (which is a marriage for a reason) first. Try to remember, you are in a phase in your pregnancy where your hormones are freaking out, (even though it's your 3rd), and you may be feeling emotionally strange. (sounds like youre having a boy). My point is, you married your husband, so the potential is there. It takes two for a marriage to start falling apart at the seams, and maybe you two would enjoy eachother a whole lot more if you stopped focusing on your ex as even an option, and started focusing on your marriage. Too many times people get divorced without a good reason because they were too lazy to work through the minor bumps. It's sad. So, I think you should try first. If you can honestly say you put in all your efforts, and still nothing, then maybe observe other options. Good luck, and congrats! I'm expecting my 3rd too, begining of April. Hardest job we ever loved!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 February 2009): I believe that maybe the feelings for your ex are intensified because you do not feel close to your husband. Since there are children involved I would try everything I could before giving that up. Including couples counselling. And as I'm sure you know having being pregnant before that the hormones tend to mess with your emotions.
And I know that I have no idea anything about your ex or your past relationship with him, but in my opinion and ex is an ex for a reason.
I know it's confusing, but I also think you love your husband. Maybe he's feeling the same way you are?
I don't know if that helped, but that's my opinion.
Best of luck!!
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