A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:What do you do if you love your best friend, and you know in your heart that he's meant for you, but he lives in another country, and he has a girlfriend that he loves and thinks of you only as a best friend? I'm going crazy because my friend is so special to me and I am so scared that my hope of him ever loving me back is gone. I just know that he's "the one" but I don't know how to make him see that. It means so much to me to have a boyfriend who is my best friend, and no other guy is ever going to fill the void.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2008): There are a million guys out there, who are just as nice, if not, better. Why waste time waiting for him, it may spoil your chances with a great man. Even if you did get together, if it went wrong you wouldn't have a best friend for life anymore. Guys can come and go but friends are there forever. Don't get someone with baggage, you want someone to have fun with not hastle with loads of issues.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2008): You can't make someone SEE anything. They will SEE what they want to see. That applies to everything in life. Its like trying to convince an evangelist that gay's have rights. You can't.
The only thing you can do is go about your life and be happy and find happiness elsewhere.
And yes people can change and have epiphanies and realisations about stuff. But that's nothing you have any control over. Change is something that can only come from within a person. NOTHING you can say, can make a person see anything, if he or she doesn't want to see.
The only thing you have control over is YOU. So go out there and make the world a better place. Laugh alot, enjoy yourself, make lots of friends, be happy, be a good person, spread love, and stop wasting time banging your head on a brick wall. If he's meant to see, he will see on his own terms. Nothing you can do about it.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (24 June 2008):
 As we say on this site over and over again, you can't MAKE him do or feel anything. If he's happy with his girlfriend and only sees you as a friend I guess you'll have to accept it. You can wait around and see if he changes his mind but I don't recommend wasting the time.
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A
female
reader, debzzido +, writes (24 June 2008):
 You cant say there is no other guy to fill the void, you dont know what the future holds, if its meant to be it will play out the way it should. All you can do is give it time and remain his best friend and he will notice that, and one day if/when things get rough with his relationship then you should step in, and let him know how you feel. If you persue it now while hes in a relationship , that may scare him off, maintain your status and life will do the rest. Keep busy dont dwell on it, and dont let him sense your sadness towards this situation. Hang in there. Life is full of lessons,the hardest times to cope with life are the strongest tests.
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