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female
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anonymous
writes: This is going to sound incredibly stupid, but here it goes. I had sex for the first time, and am not sure if we did it right. I think he put it in the right hole, but I'm confused. I'm too embarrassed to ask anyone, so can someone explain where he was supposed to be? Like it felt like really far down compared to where I thought he'd be (like closer to the clitoris)...I just wanted to know, thanks.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (24 July 2006):
 Well, have you ever done any exploration of your genital region? You might need to be a little flexible, and you can even use a mirror to see, but you only have three openings: your urethra (urine), your vagina (sex/babies) and your anus (excreta).
Your urethra is up high, near your clitoris, but it's very small, with a diametre of about a drinking straw, so no way is his penis going in there! It'd be impossible.
You'd certainly know if he was putting it in your anus, I'm sure!
Which leaves your vagina. It's a lot lower down than you'd expect, if you were a deity and designing a woman's body, but you have to remember that a vagina is designed to allow babies out of the womb. Sexual pleasure is incidental, and not guaranteed, simply because your clitoris is right away from the area.
There's almost no way you can "miss" the right entrance when you're having sex, even if you don't know what you're doing. However, normal vaginal sex -- on its own -- doesn't usually feel orgasmic for most women. In fact, depending on your frame of mind, it can feel like nothing, feel good, feel great or even feel horrible.
It sounds like you had a fairly standard female first-sex experience.
Might I suggest that you go to the library and get some books on female sexuality, or even basic human reproduction, so you can swot up and know what to expect, and how to make things more enjoyable for the next time?
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