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female
,
anonymous
writes: Hey...i don't know whats wrong with me? Sorry i think this is going to be a long one!....My friend and i have been 'best' friends since we started high school, basically 5 years. Out of the two of us i have always gotten the most attention from people whether it be guys or friends. She has always been a great friend and we have neva fallen out. However over the last 2 years jess* started putting makeup on, doing her hair, wearing nice clothes etc. Even though i have a boyfriend she met this new guy...he is VERY good looking. Whilst having one of out many girly chats she mentioned that she and tom* had been getting close...before this i had never even looked at him in 'that way' but jealousy kind of hit me. I aquired his phone no., msn address etc off friends and started to flirt with him. He flirted back but still made it clear he didn't like me 'in that way'. However when me and jess would talk and his name popped up i insinuated to her that he liked me. Jess' face obviously looked disapointed and hurt and she just said, 'well if you too like each other then...go for it!'...this made me feel like i had power and it felt good.Then whilst talkin to tom one night he said to me that he was worried that he'd done something to annoy jess*. Usually guys find me so much more attractive so i told tom i liked him etc and he really bluntly and rudely said that he wasn't interested and he liked jess. I then told him that jess didn't like him... tom then reminded me i had a boyf.So i dumped my boyf so that i could make jess jealous.Basically everything backfired on me and i lost my bf and the trust of my best friend. tom and jess are together now....but im scared that i'll get jealous of her again and i don't know what was wrong with me...its screwed i know..help....xxx
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 December 2005): god u probably have hurt her for a lot longer time than u might think.....u are very young obviously and are deep down good-hearted, but you owe her sincere and hopefully acceptable apologies or something.....humble yourself just a skosh and appeal to feelings a bit...take care!
A
female
reader, kellyO  +, writes (27 December 2005):
 Hi dear, i have to say u didnt treat u bestfriend right. Jealous is a healthy feeling but not when u take it to such extreme. u tried to take the guy she really likes from her even though u could see something developing between the two of them.
U said she didnt attract attention i guess she was low on her esteem probably that is why she went for a make over. you should have encouraged her not try to compete with her.
I must say i dont blame her for not trusting u again. i wouldnt. you seem to want all the attention but u have to realise that she deserve abit for herself too.please stay back and leave those two alone.u should respect her enough to at least to want her happiness. i think that is the best gift u can give her for now.
my advise now is that you should focus on your own life.U can see that trying to ruin her affairs backfired.that should be a lesson and warning. Go out and have fun with friends and enjoy. You will meet your own idea guy.
Take care dear.
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