A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:A mutual crush developed between me and my boss at my last work place. However, nothing developed as we were working together. While I was there his body language towards me was a dead give away. It took a while for my feelings to start developing. He would ask me prying questions for which I never answered. For example he asked whether I was a Ms or a Mrs. I did not answer straight and have regreted it ever since.I have been gone for over a year and I have tried to instigate meetings. When I called him about a reference request, we talked for ages about everything. I could not bring myself to ask him out. It did not feel right at the time.I recently sent him an xmas card and again hinted, it would be nice to meet. He returned a card but no mention of a meeting. I could tell the card was posted privately and not through the companies post.I have never met anyone like him before and can not stop thinking about him. I would like to get to know him as a friend. I was a manager at that organisation and he always had a lot of time for me. I know people were starting to notice our crush and I feel he was a little embarassed by it. I am not longer there. However he did try to ask me a little about my personal life. He does not know that I am in a very unhappy relationship.These days women are more forward. I have tried to play hard to get, that did not work. I have tried a little of a direct approach. Not sure what to do anymore. Dont want to embarass him or myself.Just want to get to know him more socially for now.Any advice welcomed particularly from men.
View related questions:
crush, my boss Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much person1234, you have given me food for thought. We only live once. He does give the impression of being rather shy hence why all his messages came over though his body language. He is quite tough in business though.
Happy Christmas!
A
female
reader, person12345  +, writes (23 December 2011):
 Well sure, it's scary and difficult to ask someone out. But nothing ventured, nothing gained. I was a total MESS when I asked out my current bf and could not concentrate until I'd heard back from him (fb messages). But I'm so glad I took the leap and asked him out, because he told me he received my hints, but was way too scared to do anything and never planned to act on it. Just take a deep breathe, remind yourself the worst that can happen is he says no, and go for it.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for your time and responses. I trust what you say about having a more direct approach. I will think of something. I find it so difficult. The bond we started to build was something very special and I do not feel I will be able to rest until I get him alone in a neutral environment.
Thanks again.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2011): Firstly end your unhappy relationship before proceeding any further with this man. then just ask him out, hinting does not work and is not a direct approach. Either ask him on a date or simply tell him your interested. I know that's harder said than done, I was in a situation last year with a guy that I liked and had a feeling he felt the same. I ended up just telling him I was ineterested and asking him out, now we have been a happy couple for over a year. Good Luck.
...............................
A
female
reader, PerhapsNot +, writes (22 December 2011):
 You've been gone for a year. What makes you think he is single still? Maybe he didn't respond to your request at a meeting because he is or has been seeing someone. If he is not a shy type and he hasn't asked you out, he's just not interested. People flirt, but it doesn't mean they want to date you.
...............................
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (22 December 2011):
If you want a response, you can't hint, you should just go ask him out. People aren't usually as direct as they think when they're hinting at something. If you're not ready to ask him on a date, ask him to go for coffee as it could go either way.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2011): "Hinting" is not "a direct approach"; asking him if he'd like to meet you for coffee (dinner, drinks, whatever) is.
If you're in a relationship, though, you should end it before you ask someone else out.
...............................
|
