A
female
age
36-40,
*alico
writes:Hi, I am wondering what I should do about a real tough situation I'm in. My fiance and I are very much in love, we just had our first baby... he is 2 months old... and we have been struggling w/ our finances and stuff. We have had to move into his parents house because there are no other options until we can get on our feet again. I cannot stand his family, and typically when I say this I mean his mom and his older sister, that doesnt even live w/ us. They constantly make comments and say things that are in a way somewhat of a put down in regards to me being a good mom. They were brought up in a crazy lifestyle and most of my fiance's moms' kids and his sisters little kids have grown up with some serious problems. I wont go too far into detail with those things... but hopefully you'll get my point. My son means the world to me and I would literally give up anything in this world just to know that he is safe, secure, and in a healthy environment. That of which I strongly feel is NOT at his mom and dads house. There is alot of strife, anger, name calling amongst the little kids, and there is hardly any stability in that house hold of 8, including myself, my fiance, and our son. i have tryed thousands of times talking to my fiance about how his mom and sister treat me, along w/ some other members of his family, and he just doesnt see it like I do. Alot of the things they do are in a sense hidden so that I am usually the only one around who see's at that time- which I know they do on purpose. I am tired of living there and its gotten to the point that I lash out when any of them are around my son because they have broken my trust with them and i do not want my son getting hurt in the ways that I have been. It is really destroying me and my fiance's relationship and plans of getting married because he wont stick up for me and it is breaking my trust w/ him as well. What do I do? My parents live in a different state almost 1000 miles away, and they would be okay w/ me living there temporarily until my fiance can get a stable job and money saved up, but I feel that that would be breaking his bond w/ his son, and I dont want to do that to them. What should I do, not just for me, but for the sake of my son's well-being???
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female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (15 September 2008):
Tell him that if he doesn't start believing you and standing up for you to his family then you are moving home with your parents.
Yes it would be better for the baby to have his dad around but at 2 months he is probably going to be oblivious for a while so you could disappear for a few weeks and the only one it would hurt would be your husband.
I think he will see this and as soon as you start packing a suitcase then he might get his act together.
Tell him exactly what has been said to you.
Good Luck!! xx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2008): Ur son is sooo lucky to have such a great mum ;-) their jelous of you and have to get over themselves just keep being you. Dont change for no one u dont have to and cant be forced to. And as women we are INDEPENDANT
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