A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I am a student in the UK and I have been studying at my school for 4 years already and I will finish my GCSE in this year. My problem is I don't know where to go for sixth form.I can't go back to current school because it is not suitable for me for sixth form but I got a girl that I love a lot in there and she is definitely staying on for sixth form. I knew this would happen so I applied to a private school in my town and they kindly offer me a 50% off academic scholarship. This private school is only 15 mins walk away from my current school. The problem of this private school is my ex girl friend and her boy friend is going to there too and I don't know how to face to them. During school time, I pretend I like her boy friend but this guy was the one who gain my trust and then betrayed me, so deep inside I really hate him (sometimes I want to beat the shit out of him).Moreover,I got into another top state school in england and this school has 20% of students in the sixth form go to Oxford and Cambridge, which is extremely rare. But I don't really want to go to there because I don't want to leave the girl that I love even though she has rejected me and there are far too many smart people in this top state school. In terms of academic, I am a winner because I can gain a 50% off academic scholarship, which is extremely difficult and got into the top state school in england but in love I am just a loser since I never manage to get a girl friend and always get rejected by girls. In conclusion, I have to choose either the private school or the top state school. The worst thing is I have no idea which one to choose.
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female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (6 December 2010):
Well what are the stats for students getting into Oxbridge from the private school? Do you even want to go to Oxbridge?
Look, this is your future and I can tell you know that all the people you know and think you love at the moment will not be in your life when you get to Uni. This girl you love - as much as it is nice to be in love, it is not like you are moving abroad so I am sure you can still see her. And if not - well then she is not the girl for you. Chances are whatever relationship you have aged 16 will not last so dont worry about girls so much.
As for your ex - she is irrelevant. You will make new friends at a new school so you wont have to be friends with her or her new boyfriend. I dont understand why you think you are a loser and dont manage to get girlfriends - you have an ex (therefore have had a girlfriend in the past) and there is a girl you love - it seems you are doing just fine with the girls!
But please, put girls and silly playground feuds aside - this is the rest of your life we are talking about here. Nothing is more important than your education, because without it you will have nothing and then no girl will want you then!
You have 2 amazing opportunities here that very few kids get - you are incredibly priviledged and should feel lucky to be in this situation. So stop worrying about friends and girls - that will all fall into place naturally. You have to focus on which school is best for you, and what will give you the best outcome to help you get into Uni at the end of it.
If you want to go to Oxford or Cambridge then first of all, make sure you get all A's at GCSE otherwise that it the end of that dream. Pick the school that is most likely to help you get there - it doesnt matter if the school is full of clever kids, that will only help you to raise your game. If Oxbridge is not so important and you will consider other uni's, then go to the school that feels right for you. Have a tour around both of them - get a feel for which place you like better.
You need to find a place where you feel you will fit in and excell academically - so take your time and figure this out with the help of your parents.
But please, most importantly - forget about girls and all the people you know from your school - they are irrelevant in this decision. This is your future we are talking about and none of these people are likely to feature in it - so put them all aside and do what is best for YOU, not for anyone else.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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