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female
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*upidStruck
writes: I'm in love with my OB/GYN (perinatologist). Unfortunately, we are both married. I met him in June when I became his patient because of very severe complications with my pregnancy. He was the most caring doctor anyone could ever have. I was hospitalized for 2 weeks and he came in day and night, even on weekends. He saved my life. I'm 37, he is 49. We are both conservative Catholics. I know he has the same feelings for me even though we never talked about it. We hug each other for a long time every time we see each other. He makes flirtatious remarks, for example: He usually comes in in his dr.s suit. So one day (while I was on hospital bedrest)he comes jumping in the door in regular clothes that underline his beautiful latin tan and says:"How do I look?" winking at me. I told him that he looked gorgeous (oops!!!) to which he replied "you can now admire my tanned arms"...we flirt like this all the time now even though I'm not his patient anymore. We also exchange emails frequently still and when we run into each other he blushes and his eyes examine me from head to toe and he tells me how good I look and then we always hug. He is driving me crazy. I think about him all the time and I know he thinks about me too because I usually get a little email from him when my feelings are very strong...Of course, this has to remain only a crush for our marriages' sake but I can't get him out of my head (even if we wanted to we wouldn't be able to avoid each other due to our work environment)...I have sexual dreams about him and if we were put into a situation in which we would be alone, it would most likely happen because the magnetism between us is just so strong. How can one shake a feeling like that?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2006): Cupid,
I see that you say that you both are getting divorced and marrying each other with his baby in tow! Wow, how great is that? Now, when he cheats on you with his next patient you will get to feel what his first wife felt when you cheated with him! Honey, you are not the only woman out there, and just as he fell for you b/c you were vulnerable, he will fall for the next damsel in distress and you will be the next one that he kics to the curb!
A
female
reader, CupidStruck +, writes (31 October 2006):
CupidStruck is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi,
Thank you two for your input. My OB and I DID take it a step further and slept together and it was wonderful-like nothing I have ever experienced before. He is getting a divorce from his wife and I am getting a divorce from my husband. My love and I cannot be apart anymore. I believe, we created a new baby as two pregnancy tests turned out postitive. We will be getting married as soon as our divorces are final. We have already moved in together in his coastal house with my kids in tow (his kids are grown)...Thank you all for your concern and input!
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A
female
reader, stina  +, writes (25 October 2006):
 Hello Cupid,
If I were in your position I would change doctors and stop flirting with this man. That will probably mean that you should stop talking with him altogether so that your tempation is limited. You probably only have a crush on him because he saved your life. But that's what doctors are there for - to help us in times of need.
You need to think about your family. And you should think about your doctor's too! I'm sure the last thing the both of you need right now is to cause your families any harm. Especially your's - I'm not sure if the complications let you keep your baby, but if you have him/her then you REALLY need to let this guy go. And if the baby didn't make it, then you and your husband really should focus on giving each other support.
I also see that you said "Unfortunately, we are both married." What do you mean unfortunately? Cupid, if you really are a "conservative Catholic" then don't you think you would want to work harder at your marriage?
Religion aside, I really think that you ought to work on the relationship with your husband. Didn't he stick with you through all of the pregnancy issues? And then all of a sudden you see a cute doctor and you're ready to say "unfortunately i'm married." Obviously something is lacking in your marriage and that needs to be addressed immediately. Relationships are lots of work and it sounds like you need to understand that a little better. I'm not trying to sound like a jerk or anything, but I do want to stress that you can't walk away from problems. And by the looks of it, you'd just be headed into a far more stressful situation if you were to leave your family and the doctor left his family, too.
Perhaps you were ultra stressed out from the pregnancy complications and that really did a number on your emotions. It probably was almost - if not equally - as stressful on your husband. I'm thinking that you two should see a therapist. Since you sound religious, you might want to talk with a priest at the church you attend. Whatever you can do to save your relationship with your husband should be done.
So the short answer to your question - you can shake the feeling by not seeing or talking to this guy anymore.
Take care.
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A
female
reader, kellyO  +, writes (25 October 2006):
 Hi Cupidstruck,
I really dont think it is your intention to shake this feelings off. Sincerely, if it were u wouldnt reply his mails or flirt.
You have to be sincere within yourself and ask yourself what it is u want to get out of this. You are married and so is he. Do u see this heading somewhere?Do u see him leaving his wife or rather u leaving your hubby?
Quite frankly,i can see this heading for a casual fling, so what happens next? You are probably going to either get hurt or hurt your family and this doesnt exepmt him from hurting his as well.
Life is all about the choices we make and whilst it isnt my intention to judge you i just want to make sure u understand different aspects and consequences if u intend to pursue this.
Hope this helps. Goodluck.
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