A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Been dating a guy for a few months. Several months into our relationship, our families were introduced to each other. When we started, I loved him very much, but just before the family introduction, I started experiencing some things. Though, I had noticed them when we started going out, but I felt it could be managed. He had made me cry severely, but I still kept on somehow. It grew worse. He would always beg me and always re-assure me of his love for me too. Now we are making marriage plans and I'm very scared. It's not that I dont love him, but there have been some issues which have happened as regards to respect for family members, I mean in both families. They've been sorted out too, but it still scares me and makes me unhappy anytime I think about it. What I mean is that there have been issues with his family and mine not getting in touch with each other after the introduction. This really infuriated both parties. Everyone is really excited that we finally are planning to be married but I'm very scared. I know I can cope with him though, but I'm still very worried and I don't know what to do.I'm presently unemployed and intend to get a job where I am. Someone is trying to help get a job here, but my boyfriend does not stay here, he stays on another side of the country. He is gainfully employed. I asked him if he would possibly think about getting a transfer to where I am as I may not be able to get one, but he is sure of getting one conveniently. He said no. He also said I might get another job where he is though there are no green lights now. This is also getting me scared, and I'm really worried. I would love to get a job, I know what it is to have a steady source of employment, I was previously working and was doing fine, but had to quit because of my studies. Please help me, I am a very confused girl right now. Marriage is fixed for 2 months time! Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 February 2011): If you are having problems in your relationship and you are that unsure about try to postpone the wedding until you resolve all of this. I think you need to be sure to have a job too. Good luck.
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