A
male
age
36-40,
*ave 101
writes:This is one messed up situation I'm in. I had been with my gf for 7.6 years and thing were a bit stale as relationships go. This young 20 yr old started messaging me via a social network site. She was in a 6 month relationship at the time. Our relationship remained fairly non serious for 2 months, her bf for not paying attention to her and we grew closer. This young girls bf was away in uni and their relationship was very strained. Anyway I decided that having strong feelings for this girl wasn't right and decided to break my relationship with my long term partner. Slightly pressured by this girl. I talked every hour of every day with this girl who works with me the same as my long term partner via bbm. Every so often this girl would go ina mood as I was still living with my long term partner, seeing out the last of our tenancy together (2 months), she would say that it killed her that I did still live with her. ( long partner oblivious of the new girl) I have lost friends of 14 yrs who have warned me off her. Now I have finally moved out this girl doesn't want me, she blows hot and cold day to day. Her ex bf has come bk from uni and I think this has brought this on? They have many mutual friends and see each other every weekend. She hides this from me best she can and doesn't msg me when she is with him. I am totally lost my whole life has crumbled around me, job flat, friends, car, family the lot! My ex I have now caught msgn another boy prior to our break up and I have literally blow my top! I have felt suicidal ag times and really need to be told what to do as I can find no resolution myself! Anyone with a miracle cure welcOme :)
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2011): Look there is some good news: good news meaning that you have released your long time gf. That was the unselfish part. U may not realise it now but you actually did your gf a favour.
As for your present situation. You disinvested in your life with your gf and wanted this other woman. Things did not work out. Karma? I am not being insensitive but u helped create this mess. Chalk it down to experience and vow never to toy with peoples feelings again.
You are not feeling suicidal ! But overwhelmed!!! Big difference. You are scared. You are now afraid to be alone. And its ok. Its human feelings of anxiety. You are also kicking yourself for throwing away 7.5 yrs.
OP did you love your gf?
And this other floozy?
Do u think if u grovel your gf will take you back? Do u even want to grovel?
I feel for you. Stop the drama and the over the top statements. Get a grip on yourself and take a deep breath and start trying to think clearly.
Is being alone right now such a bad thing? Maybe u will actually find yourself during this time.
Be grateful for what u have and slowly move on.
OP, why not talk to someone about how u are feeling. There should be many trained counsellors in your area.
MODS: I read in the forum section (if my memory serves me correct) that any "suicide" issues do not get posted because "something/anything" can tip the scales. Is this one of them or is the OP merely expressing his overwhelming nightmare????
LoveGirl
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2011): Life is about choices. You made some pretty bad choices in your life and the aftermath is too much for you to deal with right now. That's okay. We've all made mistakes and had to live with the consequences.
You need to start thinking practically and clearly. If you are feeling suicidal, you need to see your GP as soon as possible who will be able to put you in touch with professionals who will be able to help you.
Once you tackle that issue, you will be able to start making practical decisions about the direction of your life. The best thing you can do right now is to stop all contact with this girl because she is messing with your head and has cost you so much already.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2011): It's not a situation you are in; it's a situation you created.
In terms of how you're feeling, you need to seek counseling. Talking to a professional will help you sort out your feelings. If you're suicidal, you REQUIRE treatment of this kind. (Suicidal feelings at times constitute being suicidal.)
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A
female
reader, janna03  +, writes (10 July 2011):
maybe as of now u are so confused as to what you should do, but i think u shouldnt stay nor pursue with either of the 2 girls at this moment, coz everything is so fresh, maybe u should try to focus on other friends, or family around you, be strong, and try to enjoy yourself for the moment, dont ever hurt yourself, i know how it feels, and ive been in that point that i cant think clearly, but dont do something drastic, just think that this will pass, and u just need time.. goodluck
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