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female
,
anonymous
writes: I recently worked with this guy at work and thought he was quite good fun but nothing more. Then people kept telling me he fancied me but I thought he was trouble being ten years younger than me and very confident. so I kept him as a mate until one night when I went out on a friend's leaving do and we all got drunk. Had a good night and he ended up walking me home and the rest...So I thought keep it as a one night stand and move on. but inevitably we did it again three more times both with alcohol involved. Now although I don't think there is anything in it I keep hoping something will happen and text him but he remains quite cool but friendly. He went on holiday for a week and sent a fairly casual text but in my head although I know I should keep a reality check I quite liked the attention but feel it will end in tears. Why do I feel this way now when before I slept with him I was casualand level headed. Before I sleep with him, and I keep my head he is like really interested but then when I give in I go all loopy la over him and he loses interest. Not looking forward to him coming back to work. Sharon
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female
reader, Phoebe Halliwell  +, writes (7 October 2006):
 Dear Sharon,
I've learned myself, by personal expierience that work and play shouldn't collide. Maybe this guy gets something out of an older woman playing hard to get with him (that's you acting cool). So when you give in, it's not fun and he looses interest. My personal advice to you would be to keep this guy as a mate. If you know deep down it'll end in tears and he can switch his feelings on and off like a bedside lamp then I think you already know what you have to do. Find someone who likes you and enjoys you for who you really are, and who preferably does not work in the same building. lol :)!
Hope this helped you,
Phoebe xxxxx
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