A
female
age
41-50,
*lair23
writes:My name is Blair, I'm a 16 year old girl. I went to boarding school my freshman year of high school in Colorado. It was my choice. I left because I felt isolated, lonely, and depresed at home. My family was going through some issues and I couldn't take it anymore so I left. Once I got there I really started to like it. I became close with one of the younger teachers, she was about 24 and we were similar in lots of ways. We got along realy well and crossed student teacher boundaries. I would hang out at her house and she would tell me stuff about other teachers and students and her personal life in complete secrecy and she really trusted me. I told her stuff about my life too and my family and she was really helpful and supportive. She was kind of like an older sister. Anyway, I grew really attached to her. I started to get sad if I didn't see her every day. I realise now, almost 2 years after we met, that I could tell her anything and I am really shy and reserved so that is saying a lot. I think I love her. I feel like she could tell me anything about herself, do anything, say horrible things to me, and it wouldn't change the way I feel about her. I would do anything for her. But I don't know if the feelings I have are sexual. I just want to be around her all the time and touch her and hug her and be near her and have her be near me and want to be with me. I am so confused. I don't want people to tell me that this is normal and lots of kids feel this way or that it isn't appropriate to feel this way because I do and I want her to love me back! What should I do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2008): Blair, If this teacher has never acted sexually inappropriate with you, then she is attached to you just as a really good friend. You want to be around her because she gives you something you need...acceptance and respect. A lot of young students get close to their teachers, in this way. They admire this person and hold them in great respect. So just because you befriended another person who is kind and supportive,---t is possible to 'love' them but in a totally non-sexual way. You likely love her as like a close sister. You have an wonderful friendship with this young teacher and she is a upstanding mentor to you. This is not sexual, dear. You come from a troubled home and you found yourself vulnerable for that 'caring and generosity' you weren't getting at home. Enjoy the gift of this remarkable friendship and realize no one is inappropriate here, Keep an open heart and cherish. her..but only as a good friend. And I also suggest you take what she has taught you, and reach out to your family. Everyone has plenty of love to share with others, in life. Take what you have learned and bless others peoples lives with that gift. And please don't confuse this teachers attentions to you for anything sexual. That way of thinking could put her at great risk of losing her career, She is simply a nice person, who came into your life at a time, when you needed her 'love' the most. Good Luck, Blair.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2008): It all boils down to your personal beliefs, what you are willing to sacrifice, and if there is any way she feels the same (moral convictions, etc.).
Quick question: You say your sixteen, but the age group you selected says '26 to 29'. Whycome?
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