A
female
age
26-29,
*rownEyesGirl
writes:hello...well, it appears that i have got myself into a really really annoyingly stupid situation.see. i like a girl. a lot. she's amazing and funny and too polite and kind.and we have a banter going about a lot of things, mainly about lesbian crushes. (although she says she is gay)anyway. we have this other friend. K. she's quite annoying. and she always puts us into awkward positions. telling us that we should go out.anyway so i was talking to k and she was doing the usual you should go out. so i spoke to the girl i like, and briefly mentioned that k was doing this again. and she said to me that it's ok she knows that i am joking when i say i am in love with her.so then i had a moment of courage. and said. am i joking? completely contradicting what she just said. and i think she completely freaked out about it and didn't respond. so i stupidly sent her another message saying i am joking.. and then tried to make it into a joke. but now i have an issue. as i had planned to tell her i liked her eventually. but now whenever i try to say it she thinks i am joking.what do i do?sorry to waste your time,kind regards...zoe x
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female
reader, AuntyAlexxmo +, writes (4 June 2011):
 Well if you believes she means it you need to decided why, is it because she dont like you back, or is it more that she is scared of her/your feelings.
Either way you need to decide if your happy just been friends, then maybe not telling her is best.
If you want more than friends then you will have to take the risk of telling her your real feelings, knowing you may lose her, although in my opinion i doubt she wouldnt ignore you forever, but she may avoid you for a little bit.
I guess its up to you.
A
female
reader, BrownEyesGirl +, writes (3 June 2011):
BrownEyesGirl is verified as being by the original poster of the question aunty alexxmo, to be honest i think she meant it! she asked me if she wanted me to ever speak to her again. and i said of course, you are my friend etc. etc. and she said ... well if you have feelings for me then i'm scared that i won't talk to you ever again. and i just said that's a bit ridiculous if you ask me. and she said it is the truth.bad romance, if it turns out she was joking about her reaction after all, i shall try my best to get closer to her. although it may be a bit hard as i have a large group of friends who only really like going out with everybody and often take offense if two or three people go out separately. and as for k . i shall try my best to stay away from her, or at least stay away from the awkward situations she tries to create.again, thank you so much.you don't know how much i appreciate your help.x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2011): Do something special for her. For some time stay away from this "K". Go out for movies and all and be close as in share things like you're life experiences, make her really confortable. Take her to her favourite places and when you know she's comfortable and likes you a lot then express you're feelings to her when you both are alone. Do it in a special way. And if you're going out with her in a group make sure you're not "invisible" and do the things she likes. And then when you express... Its gonna be a yes or a no. You have to face it.
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A
female
reader, AuntyAlexxmo +, writes (2 June 2011):
You said you were joking with her, so was the answer she gave you said in a joking kind of answer too, or did it sound like she actually meant it?
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A
female
reader, BrownEyesGirl +, writes (31 May 2011):
BrownEyesGirl is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni was still testing the grounds tonight. and i was speaking to her about it again, and asked her what she would do if i really did tell her my feelings. and she said that she would never speak to me again and would run away. should i still tell her, because i still love her as a friend
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A
female
reader, AuntyAlexxmo +, writes (31 May 2011):
Your not wasting anyones time darling!
You have done what may people do, made jokes out of an issue to test the ground and break the ice, in preperation for talking about it seriosly, and like many people you let the joke go on to long.
The best thing to do now is just be really honest, make sure you tell her that you mean what you are saying, and then tell her how you feel, and if she freaks out at first give her time to take it all and and dont get scared yourself and pretend it isnt true again.
Good luck, you'll be fine.
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