A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Annoying my question seems to have disappeared so I'm re-posting (as opposed to a counter-strike in fencing). In short I am desperately in love with a not-so-close friend and am concerned about telling her how I feel. My primary worry is that she already suspects something and is trying to subtly avoid emotional issues/enquiry, even a simple "are you ok?." I've tried to blot out my thoughts and feelings toward her but to no avail and am becoming nigh on obsessed; I literally can not stop thinking about her. I need a solution that will clear this up without embarassing or hurting her. I'm happy enough to take whatever emotional wounds are required to clear this up. I just can't bear the thought that I'm making her uncomfortable. Her happiness is paramount, I guess that's love no? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, celousrach  +, writes (12 October 2007):
hey am sorry 4 dat coz currently am in Malaysia nd am frm Botswana nd am schooling in Limkokwing unv. i left ma galfriend Olekantse Bronia Mogatle nd i cnt stop thinking bout her eventhough there are hot chics who happen 2 be so close 2 me but i cnt do it. jst look 4 someone else who will also luv u coz most of da friendships break up coz one party will wnt 2 take the relationshp 2 another level nd the ada 1 will be dissapointed.gud luck neh!
A
female
reader, coconips +, writes (11 October 2007):
Just take things nice and easy your friends right? how bad can things be? Get her on her own and talk to her then bring up the subject that you like her, and see how things go. Maybe she likes you too. Remember things always seem worse than they usually are. Good Luck xx
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A
female
reader, flower girl +, writes (11 October 2007):
 You could try putting it on paper how you feel about her and then there are no awkward moments while she finds out, after she has read it if she feels the same then i'm sure you will find out and if not then it's probable nothing will ever be said to save any embarrasment then at least you will know where you stand.
Take care.x.x
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A
male
reader, Chetz  +, writes (11 October 2007):
i'm in the same situation as you. I'm deeply in love with a not-so-close friend. I can't stop thinking about her as well. ok, well, this is all the advice I can give you. If she's got a bf, then don't tell her at all, because that would make her feel very uncomfortable and then there'll probably be problems in her relationship with her bf. that'll make her upset, and obviously, their happiness means more than anything to people in our situation. and if she doesn't have a bf, well, i see no harm in telling her, as you said you're willing to take all the emotional wounds, but try to say that you like her a lot, don't say you love her because that would be a bit disturbing for her (as she is not a close friend), and try to add a little giggle after that, it could help. good luck!!!
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