A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have fallen into deep depression and cry every day and night over the man who left me for his maby momma. I guess i just cant accept that he is gone because everything was so perfrct and this one thing spoiled everything. He is moving on as though i never existed and that hurts me and i feel he never really loved me. My mom died of a broken heart and i am afraid that i am going the same way. Will this get better and will i ever be able to move on? what can i do? Is this the end for me? Why couldnt he just stay with me and be there for his baby too?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2007): Hi Hon, I'm actually going through the same thing myself, except mine left me over a stupid, minor reason. its been 3 months and i sometimes still cry over him. the pain won't ever go away because you loved him but one thing i do know is that he didn't love you enough to want you in his life. i know you feel worthless and disposable but the sad fact is, if he doesn't care why should you?. he will come to regret it, in the meantime don't let yourself get too low. remember he's moving on with his baby. just keep strong girl, you will meet someone who truly loves you one day :). All the best xx xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much for your answers, they are helping me alot even though my moving on seems to be slow and i dontt hink there is a light at the end of the tunnel.But "atomickeg" how can him going back to his baby momma be a good thing? Couldnt he have chosen me?
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A
female
reader, fascinated  +, writes (12 June 2007):
 First of all, you need to come to terms with what has happened. Often as women we hold onto a relationship because we think it was great, but the truth of the matter is that it was not as great as we thought it was. Yes, you may have had great times with this man, but when it came down to it - he left. His true colors have been shown. It is obvious that he was not as invested in the relationship as you were. And you deserve more than that! You have a beautiful and loving heart, and you deserve love and loyalty in return. Do not settle for anything less. This man has failed the loyalty test. He did you a favor, better now than later. It is time for you to move on. It is natural to grieve the loss of this relationship, you had feelings for this man. Do not beat yourself up for having hurt feelings. Do not fear of dying of a broken heart. Take comfort in the fact that you have a heart. A heart capable of great love. Love is precious. But right now, instead of giving that precious love away to other people, turn a little of it around and give it to yourself. Take some time to dote on yourself. Do something special for yourself. Find a good female friend and spend some time together. Treat yourself to something nice, just for you. Even if it is something small. In the future, don't be quick to offer a man your heart. Your heart is precious and valuable. It is the most precious and valuable thing any of us women have. A man should be able to show you that he is trustworthy and loyal before you give your heart to him. Be sure to keep a good support network. When you meet a man, dont give up all your time with your family and friends just to be with him all the time. Very often as women we lose our identity as soon as we get into a relationship, because our lives start to revolve around our man. Many times a man will lose interest in us, because the person that he fell in love with is no longer there. What made us special is gone, because we no longer do those things we did when he first met us. Instead we become needy and emotional because now our whole life revolves around him, and him only. That is a lot of pressure to put on a man, and most men will run. Do not make a man the center of your universe unless he is your husband. Only a husband deserves to be the center of your universe. So remember... Love yourself, allow yourself permission to grieve, and when you meet someone you like again - don't give him your heart until he has proven that he is worthy of it. Keep your support network of friends and family, be sure to continue to spend time with them. In the best case, your new man will stay interested in you and have more respect towards you and think more highly of you. In the worst case, if it doesn't work out with your new man, you will at least have maintained a good support network, and the pain of the breakup will not be as bad, and you wont have to face it alone. Don't look for a man to fulfill your life or make your life complete. Have a complete life without a man and one will come along just begging to be a part of your already wonderful life. And if he doesn't, then in the least you will have a nice life anyway. And regarding this man who just left, he didn't deserve you. Not in the least. Onward and upward, my friend.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2007): A Female,
I just wanted to say I have been there and done that. I flew in and out of one guys life for many many years. He always went back to his son's mother, it was the hardest thing in my life. I finally gave up on it completely. Many many many days and weeks were spent crying but I got over it. I would like to say moved on but I didn't as luck would have it we are back together and have been for over two years now. Things are going great for us and we are going to be married before long. Walk away and maybe things will end up working out with him. If not you will find someone even better and more exciting.
Best of luck in all you do!!
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