A
female
age
36-40,
*ruela777
writes:Ok, I will try to make this short, however it is not easy story is quite difficult to descibe in short sentences:)All started when I have first time cheated on my with my colleague. It almost came out, but somewhow I managed to glaze it out and we worked together to forget about silly affair (my husband still thinks that it nothing sexually happened...). Ok so I sweared to myself that I would not do anything like this anymore..!! So I did not till a year and half ago I met this cute guy:) (through my friends, who happens to me my best best best friend for ever !!! now)So we have started our affair and I thought that he was into me, but then our seceret relationship started to break...we still casually had sex, but would not even kiss whilst having it! we were not friends, because we would feel kind of shy around each other...at least me... so I never been able to open up and show my personality to him,,,He left to live in another country..i was suffering a lot, but then me and my friend went to visit my secret ex lover, and we made out again...when I was flying back home I has some many thoughts of leving my husband and starting new life in new country... However I somehow understood that I want this because I have huge crush on this guy! so...I left it there...I know that he was asking my friend when She is comming back with me to visit him...so...hm...I got a bit confused...Now the biggest shit happened...MY best friend has a boyfriend of 10 years and is in love with him, however she fell for this guy she knows for at least 7 years, This guy (lets call him Mr. Y) is the best friend of her's boyfriend, her and my ex lover...Mr. Y is cute..has lovely smile and I love his attitude, loves his job.. (he had Girlfriend, but juts recently split up with her)Ok so somehow it happened that we started texting each other ...and then he asked me out... I said no for the first time, but was so excited that e texted me!!! Oh my GOD!I told my best friend about his text message (not that I replied to him), she got really nervous and upset... (you see she thinks that he might have some feelings for her... as they had sex once).. I have assured her that nothings is going to happen between us and that I am not interested into him.. I told her that I am still in love with my ex lover (well I am, but then ....)Mr. Y and I continued texting each other(not really frequently...) and one night I agreed to meet him..So.. I have met him once, twice, trice...fouth time...WE chatted for hours..drank wine...chatted again..then went to bed and had sex...it was OK.. nothing too special, however I feel so relaxed around him and confident.He makes me feel at ease more and more and we share so many thouhts about life and experiences..The last time I met him, we went out, and he took me to this club where one of his best friends were having the birthday party.Mr. Y introduced me to his friends and seemed quite proud of who he was with, but not in a cocky way.. He was chilled out and relaxed...we agreed to drop of one of his friends home.. whilst in the car we all got engaged into the conversation.. especially em and his friend... I could see Mr. Y looking at me frequently whilst drinving.., but I could see he was happy that I got well with one of his friends.Ok so, sorry for the long story...hope it made snece...My question is..not really a question..I dont know what to do?!I need more than I have inmy marriage!I love my husband, but he is more settled and I know he would not vbe as fun as Mr. Y...I know Mr. Y wants to settle down and keep parties free life..What shall I do?!? Tell my friend? tell my hsband?
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affair, best friend, cheated on my husband, crush, engaged, has a boyfriend, my ex, shy, split up, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2008): You are the poster child for "selfish". This is not high school anymore and you are playing with fire.
It always amazes me the lengths people with go to just to satisfy some selfish fantasy.
Destroying families and friends.....
When you are "older" you will look back with much regret...but remember this, what goes around, comes around...Good luck
A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (27 April 2008):
 I get the feeling you married way to young and just ain't mature enough yet for a long term relationship.
You don't seem to care the slightest for anyone else feelings, not your husband, not your friend, not this first lover and not the second one.
Lots of people want to mess around and have fun when they are young but you can't both be married and be free at the same time.
I suggest you get divorced and try to sort out what you really want. If it is a steady relationship you really got to learn to say no, and if it is to mess around then make accept that a long term relationship just ain't what you need right now.
But what you are doing right now is messed up and can only result in people getting hurt.
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