A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I met her in one of my classes, she was very introverted. Hardly talked to anyone, but luckily she often talked to me and i have often dropped her off, near her house many times. This was the point at which i start liking her.Prior to our last class, i bought a pen for her, but unfortunately was not able to give it to her, but after returning i sent a msg to her and she replied that this is high time for studies and you should concentrate on it.Thereafter, luckily, some of her lectures were at same time as of mine. She again initiated talks with me and in all exams we both talked on our way together for 5-10 minutes. Around the time of the last exam i managed to drop that pen into her bag without letting her know.Thereafter, she didnt reply me for my msgs.Now, after 1 year, i send her good wishes AND got a reply.I got the fb frndship request from her as i asked her whwther she z on fb or not.After talking to her on sms's AND seeing sum of her post on fb, i came 2 know dat she z very depressed, i hav asked reason many times but she z not willing to tell it. I am damn sure dat she is in depression. I am in serious luv wid her AND wan her to remain happy.Now, feeling uncomfortable about why she is so depressed AND I want to help her.Please advise me as i am very confused about her behaviour towards me,, i am very clear for her AND want to marry her.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Abella  +, writes (24 December 2011):
 You may have feelings for her. And she may have feelings for you. But her health is more important than any feelings she or you have for each other.
However you cannot fix her depression.
And it would seem that you have not yet felt the time is right to broach such a sensitive subject as possible depression.
Because she may not be depressed at all - but instead may be a very quiet reserved girl who is introverted. or perhaps she has little confidence in herself. Or has low self esteem.
So all you can try, so far, is to find ways to talk to her, share lunch with her. If she spends time in the library then find a way to approach her and ask, "Is it OK if I sit here with you to study?"
And taking her home is another good opportunity to speak to her.
And you might even, as you become more confident with her, raise the subject of depression by referring to things you have read recently. Then, if you feel the time is right, ask her, "what do you think is the best way to help people deal with depression?'
The links below represent some thing you may care to read to understand her situation and empathise with her and try to understand how she is feeling right now..
depression
http://helpguide.org/topics/depression.htm
Sites in India
http://www.hotpeachpages.net/asia/asia1.html#India
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