A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I have this guy friend back home. I used to be crazy about him, but when i found a bf i stopped. Lets call the guy L( the one back home). L broke up with his gf when i did with my bf. Both of us cheated on our bf/gf with each other. We became FWB. Everything was cool. Then we kinda stopped because i moved to the UK. When i came to the UK, he found a gf. And they started dating like 5 days since meeting each other. He tells everyone he is with her just cos he is bored to be alone,but ok. And when i am here in the UK we dont speak much. But when i am on holidays back home then we do meet up. And we will speak a lot like constantly and we are more honest. BUT he still tries to kiss me. We went to eat something, and sitting there he kept on staring a tme, like his pupils laos became so big... And he tried to kiss me but i kept on refusing cos he has a gf. But he kept on saying how it doesnt matter because she wont know.He realised i got a bit nervous, because i do want to kiss him, but im worried if i do. He was very nice with me, like none of the guys were ever this nice to me.He walked me home and he managed to kiss me on the way, i couldnt resist!haha. As we were friends FWB he tried again something with me,but in a nice way though and i told him i dont want to cos ill feel horrible cos of the gf,etc. He tried few more times. BUt i still said NO. But he was still nice to me,he still respected me a lot. When we said bye i kinda did regret that nothing happened, but i was still proud. Also, when i told him about this guy which i had a thing and how this guy didnt want to use a condom etc, L got really annoyed and angry cos of not respecting me etc. which was actually nice of him,like he cares.And he texted me few days ago asking me when am i coming home. And he said how we have to meet up again for sure.I know this may not be enough detail, but i dont know what to do... I will meet up with him because he is my friend for 7 years. BUt not sure if he actually feels something towards me? or he just likes me as a friend? Should i still say 'no' cos of the gf? Or what?ANy advise?THANK YOU xxx
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2013): You need to decide first what you want from him.
He is a friend who has a girlfriend, but you used to sleep with him.
If you want him to continue to be a friend and don't want him to touch you sexually again - you have to tell him and mean it.
Whatever you do, be honest with yourself and him.
It would be a bad situation If you had sex again.
A
female
reader, VSAddict  +, writes (24 March 2013):
 He has a gf, and the fact that he's still trying to put moves on you shows you he's NOT worth your time at all. He misses the FWB thing. That's all it is. He has the impression that you can be his play thing whenever you come to town. You need to make it clear to him that nothing is going to happen again between you two until/unless he is single. By letting something happen between you two, he is disrespecting you and you are disrespecting yourself and the gf, which isn't worth someone like him. Hopefully the gf finds out what kind of a person he is and hopefully you won't ever fall for it.
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