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female
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*onroe
writes: I'm 19 and have been going out with my boyfriend for nearly 2years and everything is amazing (cliche i know)! During my last year of School i became incredibly good friends with this boy (Josh) (we were the leads in the same play)! We hung out with each other everyday and then we ended up sort of seeing each other (I was with my boyfriend - uhh i know)! The summer was approaching and in September i was going to be leaving for Drama College in London, there was something about this that made Josh upset and angry, but I didnt want to lose him so i told him I wanted to be with him and I'd split up with the boyfriend (even though I didnt really want to). Josh then rejected this and said it was over, but was really gutted and kept writing me poetry. I didn't hear from him then until the Christmas just gone, he rang me out of the blue and said how much he missed me. I haven't stopped thinking about him ever since it stopped, but he was such a good friend I think I just want that back (he's alot like 'Big' from sex and the city) and I've never ever been like this over anyone and its not childish and yes, I am still with my boyfriend because I simply loveeeee being with him!! I dont want to stop thinking about josh but i dont know what to do, I think I might actually be 'in love - uhhh' because its not what he looks like or anything sexual, its just because of the way he makes me smile and laugh (hes so sarcastic) and makes me feels! and the way I make him feel! Help Me!!!
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female
reader, smeedle  +, writes (31 May 2006):
 You want it all dont you, well sadly you cannot have it all, you need to make choices and as martini says you need to either finish with current and persue Josh or forget Josh and put all your energies into making your relationship work.
Josh sounds like he would have been a very good friend but you went further than just good friends and now that chance has gone, if you try to be friends with him now you will one day fall back into bed with him and that would be wrong and confuse you all the more.
It is Make your mind up time.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 May 2006): If you love someone else, then your relationship with your boyfriend should cease to continue. The choice to break-up and follow through with that choice feels difficult because it's coupled with guilt and possibly with obligation. However, if you persist in continuing your relationship now, you will for sure, hurt your boyfriend even more.
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