| A
female
,
anonymous
writes: I hate one of my partners children. She is under 10 years old but tries to act alot older. She is obsessed by her dad and tries to snog him and touches him in an inappropriate way. He has recently agreed that it is inappropriate and has tried to stop it but she wont stop. Her mother wants my partner back and i know she is influencing her daughter and possibly encouraging it. My partner and i want to move in together but i have said i cannot have his daughter acting like his other woman in my home. He has agreed but doesnt want to punish his other daughter by not having them to stay. I have children and would not be able to have one stay and not the other, so can understand his dilema. This is causing us to argue and we are getting close to splitting up. What can we do? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Outspoken12  +, writes (28 March 2013):
Modnote: the girl would not be 17. It could still be reported.In this case I would have reported this to social services in 2006 when this occurred. This is not normal behaviour and this child is at risk! Maybe not from her father but from another adult she may possibly believe this behaviour is acceptable to And may do it to another man! Don't delay, call them , don't tell your current partner either. And certainly don't let this split you up. Its not the daughters fault and you need to act quickly!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 August 2006): I agree with Baby Girl
My feeling is that there is something more sinister about your partners child displaying such sexual behaviour. For a child that young to exibit tendancies like that, I would say, it points towards some kind of abuse or serious emotional problem. A child under 10 should be asexual; they should not show sexual interest at all. They should be very much innocent and nieve. I wonder if this child has had a serious lack of a proper, stable male role model.
I am also very worried that you "hate" this child. Perhaps it is for the best if you and her father don't pursue a relationship together?
...............................
A
female
reader, kellyO +, writes (19 August 2006):
 Hi there,
I think u should try not to swallow the bait here that is being offered to you. It clearly stands out that your partner's daughter is trying to indicate to you is more special and has a better hold on him than you have. She is probably jealous and resents the fact that you have come to replace her mother and also the attention she receives from her father. She is still a child and you should be careful how u handle the situation so that u dont get caught up in a conflict between the father and daughter which seems to be what is happening now.
For me i think you have handled the situation well so far. You have told your partner how u feel and he has seen cause for your complaint. If u really love him and want to be with him the best thing u can do now is ignore her. Dont show to her that her attitude affects you in the slightest way. If u do this she is bound to get tired and stop. Also,since u have already told your partner and he is aware of how u feel then u dont need to turn to him anymore even if u notice that she still engages in this act becos it is bound to cause conflict between the two of you which is what she is after. Dont fall for her tricks.
If u finally decide to move in with him since that is your decision to make then try to treat her the same way you treat your kids ignoring any tantrum she throws at you and trying your best to avoid getting your partner involved. When she realises that you are more of a friend and isnt paying any attention to her ways then perhaps she will change her views about you and let you in.
Take care of yourself now and all the best.
Kelly.
...............................
|
