A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hi all, 6-7 years ago , i was messaging a girl on Facebook, probably very cringey and embarrassing texts , nothing came of it and i deleted her of Facebook , 4 years ago I started dating my current girlfriend, been together 4 years now, that girl from 6 years ago is my GFs cousin , and only recently It's dawned upon me that my gfs cousin will still have these messages on her Facebook account , unless she has deleted them years ago, I'm a massive over Thinker and I don't know what to do , just the thought of her scrolling down her messages and seeing my name and reading through them , to then probably tell my girlfriend is doing my head in . I don't know weather to tell my girlfriend , but then she will ask her cousin , if her cousin has forgotten it will cause a shit storm. Should I delete Facebook ? I know that gets rid of my name atleast above the messages .... or am I just over reacting ? After all she has known I have been with my girlfriend for long enough now , surely she would have said something by now
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cousin, facebook, text Reply to this Question Share |
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female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (9 April 2018):
You are completely over reacting. Look it seems to me that you are a worrier. Try and let it go. Whatever the messages where about you where a teenager and we all do silly things growing up. If the cousin wanted to cause trouble she would have done so before now. You have both been together four years. That is a long time. I doubt very much the cousin still has the messages from all that time ago. Try and worry less and just enjoy life. Remember you have done nothing wrong.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2018): You were a teenager 6-7 years ago. If they are cousins and she hasn't shared the messages back then; why would she go digging through messages from nearly 10 years ago?
Who keeps messages that long? Unless you planned to unseat a politician, or extort a billionaire?
She has gone through at least 6-7 phones, and storing messages that long on your phone or computer isn't worth wasting the memory.
Bro, she has forgotten all about them. It may come-up in conversation if she recognizes you; but man-up and apologize if among the messages was a dick-pic or very inappropriate language. You were a silly adolescent boy back in those days. Hopefully you have matured and come a long-way since then. At best, your girlfriend will laugh at you.
Don't bring it up, for one thing.
If they were highly illicit and sexually-provocative, I guess you'll reap what you've sown! I'm teasing, I think you're tripping for no reason.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2018): Mate, I wouldn't worry. How many messages will she have sent to other people since then? She'd have to scroll a long way down to notice them, even if she has them still!
And even if she does remember and mentions it, just brush it off: "I can't believe what a cringey guy I was" or "that's so embarassing!" Everyone's done things like that, laughing with people about it is the better thing to do!
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A
female
reader, Dionee' +, writes (6 April 2018):
I think that what happened 6-7 years ago is irrelevant... you seem to be a very different person now. Another thing is; I doubt that she kept your messages through the years and if she did, she probably won't cause rubbish unless she's really immature. I think that with this one; you're overreacting. You need to breath and realise that it happened so long ago that it really at this point shouldn't matter. Maybe it would even make for a good laugh; who knows.
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