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male
,
anonymous
writes: Two years ago I had the classic "mid life crisis". I became isolated from my wife and family, and began sabotaging my relationship. When my relationship with my wife broke down I considered the possibility of a relationship with a female friend of mine. I left home for a couple of weeks. A good friend steered me in the right direction in the nick of time and I returned to my wife and things have been better for a year and a half. I love her dearly and love my life, but cannot shake the fear that she will want revenge on me at some point in the future.Her work is going to involve increased socialising and networking and I am convinced she will meet someone else. Nothing in her behaviour has suggested that she either plans or intends to do this, but I can't get the fear out of my head and it is beginning to undermine our relationship again. I don't want to lose her or drive her away. What should I do?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, mommyofthree +, writes (19 November 2005):
 Just because you had thoughts of infidelity doesn't mean she ever has or will. It sounds like you are transferring your giult of what you almost did onto her, which I'm sure you realize isn't fair. If she has forgiven you then chances are she is not thinking about revenge, if that's what she was out for you would have known much sooner than now. Relax and enjoy your marriage, your wife gave you a second chance don't mess it up.
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