A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:this is long, i'm sorry but i just am looking for any support or advice.well a couple of weeks ago i went to a friends party. There was a lot of people there and a lot of alcohol. i got really drunk, to the point that i couldn't handle anything i was doing. all i remember is being in a bathroom with a couple people and then they left and it was just me and this guy. he took advantage of me being drunk and i guess i gave him head. some people walked in when it was happening. the next morning my close friend called and asked if i gave the other guy head last night. with a school of a lot people, the news of me and that guy has gone around really fast. a lot of the guys i hang out with always say stuff about it, and it's really annoying. they are just joking around , but to me it's not funny at all. There's also the fact that the guy was 18, and i am younger than him and that is illegal. That bothers metoo. He called the next day and appologized for it and everything. He said he regretted it and i was really drunk and it shouldn't have happened.it's really not like me to do that, and usually it's something that doesn't really bother me what people think of me, But i honestly don't want people to look at me as a whore or slut or anything. and another thing is that i really like this other guy, i don't know if i should tell him, cause i feel really bad. he's talked about us dating and stuff before this incident happened, and we are not dating yet and i don't think he will ever find out because he doesn't hang out with any of my other friends that were at the party. i just don't want him to find out by someone else though, and then end up being mad.
View related questions:
drunk Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2008): Great advise from the last aunty.
She summed it all up to a T.
Someone should have helped you.
Its called babysitting and no you never want to be the friend someone has to keep an eye on but isn't that what friends are for? I think you need to question who your friends really are. If I ever saw one of my friends and knew she was out of control drunk I wouldn't have left her in the bathroom with a guy never mind 2 guys.
That's pretty sad and frightening. You need new friends. Better friends.
I hope you learned a good lesson over this.
I wouldn't tell the guy you like. I maybe would say you did something so dumb and regret and feel really bad about it but its over and you won't let it happen again. If and when he asks what it was just say you don't really want to say but it wasn't any bad to anyone else but yourself and somewhat personal.
He should be amazed at your acceptance of responsibility and the fact that your so upset and it won't happen that if he does find out he will know why you didn't say what it was.
Just put it behind you and start over fresh. Never being that open to being taken advantage of like that again.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2008): We all do stupid things in our youth. Mistakes are natural and fine as long as you learn something from them. You can't undo what has been done but you can make better choices next time and commit to wise choices of judgment.You are young and you will probably drink a little more than your suppose to a few more time in your life; but eventually you will learn that people who drink in excess and drink to the point in which they have no self control are the least attractive people at the party.Before I sound like a total mother, I will let you know that I am 23. I have gotten drunk many times and made a fool out of myself. The last time was a few years ago in which I allowed the host of a party to get me really drunk just because I didn't want to say no or kill the party vibe. I drank close to 2 bottles of wine and had alcohol poisoning. I spent the entire night throwing up uncontrollably while others giggled in amusement. The next morning I made a promise to myself. I promised that I would never allow myself to drink that much again. I didn't want to be "that girl". The girl who trips over her words and says stupid things. Or, the girl that thinks that in order to have a good time, she must be standing over a toilet at the end of the night. The first thing about being an adult is assuming responsibility for yourself and having self-respect. So next time you drink, hopefully it will be a long time before you do, you will remember how physically ill and humiliated you were.As far as your crush goes, if he gets to know you better, being that your in high school he will probably find out. Prepare yourself for it. You made a very unwise and foolish decision and he might not respect you for it, even more, he might be afraid of being in a relationship with you since you have a history of some unsavory behavior. If that is the case, then tell him honestly what a big mistake it was and how you will never allow anything like it to happen again. On the other hand, he might be understanding. He has no reason to be mad and if he is you have full right to tell him. It wasn't as if you were together. It is something that is in your past.Just be smart from now on. You put yourself in a situation where you were vulnerable and easy to take advantage and someone did!!! You never want to allow that to happen again because that is not the woman you are or aspire to be.
...............................
|
