A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid, I'm in a relationship with the most perfect guy in the world. We knew each other for years and been close friends before we started dating a year ago. I know lots about him and he is beautiful person inside out and the way he treats me is fabulous. He is the first guy I had sex with eventhought I had boyfriends before, but I am not his first (he slept with 4-5 girls before me) and I'm okay with that. But sometimes, for no special reason, I get jealous about those girls before. I think this is what people call retroactive jealousy. I don't hate them, nor I think something negative about them, I even know few and they are nice persons but somehow when I think about the fact that he has been intimate with them breaks my heart not because he had fun but because someone else other than me had him. If that makes sense. I don't want to make him feel guilty for having sex with them, that's not my intention, I just want to understand why do I feel this way. It's obvious that this feeling is irrational, and I trust and adore my man so we do not have any issues on that level.Couple of days ago, I came across the movie "Chloe'' where the wife paid some girl to seduce/sleep/whatever with her husband (thats not the point here) and after the girl did that, the wife aked her to tell her every.detail of that even though it will make her sad/angry/so on. She.kind of enjoyed in torturing herself with that. I'm not sure about my situation compared to this one, but sort of the kinky satisfaction or excitement does exist. Or I'm just really confused and trying to make any desperate sense out of the situation. My apologies in advance for such a long post, and please do not judge my english. Have a nice day!
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2014): its quite natural for many girls to feel jealous especially if they're with a fabulous guy. it even happens to me from time to time with my current bf. so to stop it, i keep telling myself, "why am i jealous? he's with me, right? he could still stay with those other girls, but he chose me. they should be jealous of me." just keep thinking that. it works for me, it could work for you! gud luck x!
A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (12 February 2014):
 Hi, look at it this way, if you and the BF break up, you would be in the same position that is not the first for guy assuming he is a virgin. We accept the person we love as a package deal, their past and their flaws, most importantly the way they make you feel. Remember if any of the exes meant more to him he would not be with you. So let it go and enjoy the fact that he still chose after sleeping with those woman. That's his past and you are his future.
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