A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:dear cupid,i'm horrible around guys, sure i know two or three, but i just can't talk to them at all. some of them are nice but i get all red and confused and then they just walk off and think i'm weird. my friends say i'll get past it but how can i believe them if i can't even say hi, how are you to a boy. i need help and it's not that i'm completly ugly or amazingly pretty, but it's hard. i've tried to talk about things that i know they like, but i cna't get past the first few words. there's one boy i can talk to easily and he's my friend.please help. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 August 2009): Well, the fact that you can talk to your friend, who is a guy, shows that you can talk to guys! Have you spoken to him about this? Maybe he could give you some advice or encouragement from a male perspective.
It is difficult to talk to guys you like. You get all flustered, and can't think straight. And usually, you are left wondering, "why on earth did I do/say that?!" But it does get better. I used to be the exact same. But over time, it stops being such a big deal.
I think you should carry on trying to talk to them, and don't let these experiences put you off. Okay, it may be awkward, but after a while you will see that it's not so bad. After all, they are only people too. There is no reason to get so nervous about speaking to them. They might be nervous too, you never know! I think guys do act differently to girls when they are nervous, so even if they seem really cool and calm, they might be nervous too!
Just start out small, try saying hello, and gradually build it up from there. What's the worst that could happen? So you might get all nervous? No big deal, you wouldn't be the first or the last person to do so! And remember, it's not just up to you to get the conversation going and keep it up, they have to play a part in it too!
Your friends are right, it does get easier, but only with time and perseverence. So keep on trying, and it will become easier after a while. x
A
female
reader, Asian!  +, writes (20 August 2009):
Just relax around think about it as no big deal. Its just like your talking to your best friend. Once you do it the first time it just get easier.
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A
female
reader, \m/J.D\m/  +, writes (20 August 2009):
 I think you should talk to that one guy more, the more time your spend around guys the easier it'll be to talk to them, just like everything in life, practice makes perfect. :)
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