A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I feel desperate and I really need someone's help.It happened yesterday, I came back from a holiday with my dad (mom and dad are separated). We returned a little earlier than we were going to and I found out my mother was sleeping with my boyfriend. I was distroyed since he was the first person I ever really loved. She hated him and always said, he was no match for me. There was no reason for it, but now I never ever want to see him again. But that's not the worst part. I went to my ex, a guy we are still good friends with. Mom hated him as well. I told him everything in detail, as I desperately needed someone to talk to. And then I found out, she made him dump me by sleeping with him as well. He said, he got really drunk and perhaps even medicated and could barely remember what happened, and he could not look me in the eyes anymore and had to break up.My whole world is inside out. I feel ashamed, devastated, betrayed. I doubt there is a person in the world I can trust. I don't know how to go on with my life.
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (25 August 2012):
 You mother have some rather SEVERE issues. She "think" you are competition and she throws YOUR "game" by sleeping with guys you seem to like.
Wow.
She ought to be ashamed of herself. Though, the guys that willingly slept with her were CERTAINLY not keepers either. A decent guy wouldn't sleep with his GF's mother or anyone else.
How is your relationship with your father? Could you possibly live with him?
And you life isn't over, it's just kind of messy right not, and none of that mess is of YOUR doing.
Consider yourself above all this mess, honey.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 August 2012): It seems to me like your mother is the one with the issues. That is the most twisted thing I have heard in a while. Perhaps you should move in with your father or another family member if you can. Suggest counselling, as well, to your mother and maybe talk to her yourself too. Tell her how you feel about it. Again, if all else fails, move out if you can. Also keep an eye on any future boyfriends.
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (25 August 2012):
 Hi
You have NOTHING to be ashamed of and you have done NOTHING wrong.
The only snake in this picture is your mother. What a conniving nasty cruel twisted woman is your mother.
Your betrayal and your pain is truly real and you have a right to be justifiably very very aggrieved. you are over 18 so I suggest you pack your bags and either move in with your father or move in with a trusted female relative.
You cannot stay with your mother. She has already proved what a nasty piece of work she is. And she will not stop doing this.
Do not listen to any of her lies.
Do not fight with her
Just leave and go without fanfare to your father or another relative who you trust.
Maybe your mother did do something to both young men. However I can see why you are heartbroken and can never face either boy again. Now that you know the truth.
the book called Toxic Parents does indeed cover such a Despicable type of parent. Please get out before this EVIL nasty woman does more to undermine you.
Please remember that the SHAME belongs ENTIRELY to your MOTHER. It is her hurtful actions that have caused you all this pain.
You are NOT at Fault in any way. Your mother is a liar if she sugggests otherwise.
This must be devastating for you.
Right now you are mourning a relationship with a man you loved very much.
It does not seem possible yet, but time is a great healer. And even this very strong pain will lessen with time.
You will survive this and go on to greater things.
I know it feels like the pain is insurmountable.
But eventually you will reshape your life.
And go on to Better things.
Best Wishes for a better future (eventually)
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