A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been in a relationship for nine years. I love him. But recently I have found myself somewhat attracted to someone else. I would never cheat, ever. But is this something that is normal? It's just a crush but does that mean I don't feel enough for this relationship?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2017): You haven't provided enough details of your relationship for us to assess whether it's just you or the relationship which causes you to have a crush on another guy. Is it a crush or a fleeting moment of attraction towards the person? Do you have these feelings only while you are with the other guy in question or these feelings continue to remain with you while you're not with him?If it is a crush and the feelings continue to remain later on where you start fancying being his girlfriend, then here's what: You are between the age of 26-29. 9 years ago, you were 17-20. Too young to make an informed choice. In these 9 years, you have grown up, experienced adulthood and learned many truths about life. You still love your bf and I'm guessing on the other hand, you know what qualities you really want in a man. Probably someone more like yourself or more compatible with you. Some of these qualities are possibly missing in your 9 yrs of boyfriend and you secretly wish you'd waited until now to make serious decisions of life since you're bumping into the kind of men you REALLY like to be with only now.I only made an analytical guess. I apologize if I'm wrong in my judgement. If indeed your bf has ALL the qualities you truly expect and look for, then maybe it's just your biological instincts, that you're getting attracted to other men. In which case, as long as they remain a fantasy, it's alright.
A
male
reader, dougbcoll +, writes (2 January 2017):
 feelings come and go. we can be attracted to many different people.the chemistry we may feel may draw us to another, that in part why people cheat, commit adultry (affairs) ect...
what do you have once the new has worn off? usually end up with a mistake, throwing away what you had that was true,and saying that (bridges are burned that people can't get back to the place they was before.)
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A
female
reader, clueless8989  +, writes (2 January 2017):
It's absolutely normal. I've gone through that phase before. Please don't overthink it because overthinking it would cause problems in your relationship. Know that both men and women in relationships will always feel attraction for other people. It will go away on its own. :)
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A
female
reader, Slippers  +, writes (2 January 2017):
Depend on how you know this other person . Is it a work colleague someone you hang with more .. little detail if you feel up to providing would help .
Everyone has this happen even your bf . You weigh up what you have to what you will lose . You say you wouldn't cheat that's your answer just make sure you are not spending more time with their person whether it be physically face to face .. online ... or texting as your leaving yourself open for some serious confusion to happen . So keep it simple .. friendly and that it's .keep well away . And work on keeping the spark between you both
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