A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I feel unloved and its got to the point where I can't be bothered with my appearance. My husband takes no interest in me and our marriage is all but over. He is 40 and I am 37 we have no children as things have been falling apart for quite some time. His family rejected me from the outset and I tried so hard and made an effort but it was never good enough and this was the start of feeling unloved because my husband did not take my side or stick up for me even. Now he leaves me on my own all week in the house to study (I'm doing an online degree) as we car share and he mainly has it for his job. I have no friends near me or family to give me emotional support as we have moved twice in fairly quick succession with my husbands job. In addition my husband has taken to seeing his own family during weekends, usually his Mother making the arrangements and excluding me of course I'm never invited. I have got so down that now with my appearance falling to bits I feel like its a vicious circle. The worse I look the less loved I feel. I'm not sure how to break this cycle because I seem to spend most of my time in the house and even when I go out to the local shops I can't be bothered to make an effort. I'm not keen to take medication so want to start with my looks... does anyone have any advice? Much appreciate it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 August 2009): Alright, in this order, first of all get mad at him for a little while, realise that your marriage is at best in trouble and at worse may well be over. without will and dialouge yo cant sustain it on your own.
As for your in-laws well frankly they can go to Hell, you married him, they dont like you thats their problem.
No give yourself and good hard kick in the ass, You are a woman, you are intelligent, you are brave, you are fun to be with and you will damn sure not be made to feel like a piece of dirt by this guy or his family for one second longer. Start today by doing one thing nice for yourself. Eat a healthy meal. Get out of the house to meet someone you can say hi to for 10 minutes (could be for a coffee , could be for a walk, volunteer) make a plan for how you are going to reclaim you.
Only when you start to feel more like you will you start to love yourself again and see this gy for what he is and then be able to make a decision about the next step.
Be strong but remember, youve only got one life dont waste it.
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