A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've fallen for this girl I met in the first week of class this fall (I'm 18, she's 19, we're both in college) but she seems so far out of my league. I don't know what I should do now, should I just give up? I feel like there's no way a girl like her would be interested in a guy like me. She's super cute, funny, and there's something about her that makes me smile whenever she's around...I guess first off, I'm not really an attractive guy. Chubby, short, nerdy Asian guy with bad teeth. I'm not built like the kind of guy that gets a second look. :xSecondly, I've talked to her quite a bit but I don't really know what she's into and stuff, I feel like my interests would just bore her. I'm into a weird mix of interests...like geek tech stuff and sports, which seems like such a stretch for one person. I just don't know how to act around her. I don't know how to tell if she's interested in something or not, or how to even ask her what she likes...Thirdly, I keep telling myself I should just go up to her and ask her, considering I've got nothing to lose but I'm too scared to. I'm more terrified of her saying yes more than her saying no because...I just don't know what I'd do then. I've -never- gone out on a date in my life. (i'm serious D:) I'm so paranoid I'd end up just making an idiot out of myself in front of someone I really like. Ughh...I don't know bleh, I just can't stop thinking about her but I feel like there's no way she'd ever think the same about me...that sounds cheesy as hell.. What do I do? :S I'm so...I don't know...messed up. _ Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 December 2010): Well if she is talking to you even casually she obviously thinks you are a nice guy. Nice enough to make conversation with and pay attention to.
She may not reciprocate your feelings or to your surprise she may.
Your interests are who you are. Unless you are planning to change who you are or take up different interests, you shouldn't feel embarrassed by your interests. That is who you are and what you like. But it is quite ok to expand your horizons and even take up different interests as well. Even if you are doing it to impress a girl or make friends. That is kinda charming. Girls generally like easy going, adventurous guys. Guys who can be flexible and versatile.
So while you shouldn't forget who you are or feel embarrassed by it, it is quite ok to try out new things. That is part of the whole college experience. Part of life.
If you are not sure where you stand with her then keep things casual. Keep talking to her, enjoying her company. Maybe register for a class you know she will be in next semester and you guys can then study together. Offer her help in some subject you might be good at. Maybe when you feel more comfortable around her you both can get coffee around campus sometime. Let things progress casually. You both are young, in college, have fun with it. Everything will be fine.
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