A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I have a previous friend of many years who developed a series of problems and lost the plot a bit.I did every thing I could to help at the time but somehow she translated this into resentment towards me and told mutual friends I was unkind to her.She went her own way after dropping this on a male friend of mine and I fell out with him over his believing her wild stories.Then she returned from abroad and I put her up as she said she had nowhere to stay for a night and she stayed three weeks until she started making more trouble for me, this time with the local authorities so that I was forced to tell her to leave.Since then I met myself a new man, but we bumped into her at a local store.Sne and he waited outside while I briefly paid for my goods.Since then it has been on my mind that she badmouthed me to him and I have often wondered if there were any interactions between them in the past or the present.When I asked my fella he said "With your fat friend?Never!" And dropped the topic.She showed up to my door once and he insisted we leave the house quickly so that i said " We're just on our way out!" She said "Who are you?" to my boyfriend rather rudely and he said "I'm her other half!"Later when I visited her she said she would never go out with a guy like mine and we talked a bit quite normally.Now I have liked this friend over the years and fate has dealt her a bad hand at times.She is vivacious and pretty but i feel a strong undercurrent of resentment towards me despite the friendship we held.Sometimes I feel she may be pursuing my boyfriend and perhaps him reciprocating.They both invited me on holiday to the same place within a week!More than a coincidence? I declined of course!But then again there is such a thing as paranoia and as I am faithful to my boyfriend I am not inclined to break it up for nothing.What do you think?
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (1 October 2015):
 I think she is stirring the pot as best as she can, I think drama is HER "life-blood", it's what makes her tick.
And I'm not sure why you keep her in your life after what she had done to you. I get that you feel a little sorry for her and that she possibly can be a fun friend from time to time, but this one? It's all about her, isn't it?
As for the vacation, my guess is she found out where he wanted to take you, so to stir the pot she invited you as well to the same spot. She hasn't told you that he is no good, all she said was she wouldn't date a guy like that. IT doesn't mean she want to date him or your bf wants to date her. All she wanted to do was sow some seeds of "discontent". She might have badmouthed you to your BF, but I think if he believed her he would have brought it up, wouldn't you?
My guess is for all her vivacious personality she is deep down jealous of you, she resents your steady life.
If I had a friend who seem to harbor some resentment towards me I'd call her on it and if she said no, not at all you are all imagining it, I'd just walk away from that friendship. I don't need or want negative people in my life.
Focus on what's good in life. And leave her to her drama.
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