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male
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anonymous
writes: I have been going out with my girlfriend for about three years, including a break-up and separations due to school and work. We have always reunited and been very close to eachother - in love actually, I believe. Lately things have not been so good: we are both insanely busy with school and work, and though we only live a 5 minute bike ride from eachother, we've seen eachother only a few times this last week. My problem is that I feel like I am growing apart from her - we have similar interests but we are also quite different on several key issues. I want to have the chance to date other girls , as she is my first ever girlfriend (I'm her first too), and I feel the need to 'test other waters,' so to speak. I'm 21 and I feel like this should be a time for experimentation - settling down can come later. However, I'm worried that I'll be throwing away one of the best things to ever happen to me - namely, our relationship. As well, I feel terrible about breaking her heart. I love and care for her, but her feelings run much stronger for me, and I don't feel like I can reciprocate that. I know that there is no Answer for this problem, but any I would be extremely grateful for any well-thought-out advice. Thanks.
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female
reader, shania  +, writes (17 October 2006):
 You cant be all that into her,otherwise you wouldn't be getting itchy feet.Your young and i can understand that you may want to experiment with other girls but dont do that at your girlfriend's expense.There isn't no easy way around this so you will have to break it off with your girlfriend and say you need a break etc...You see there is two ways that you can look at this,1)You risk losing her but you get the chance to date other girls or 2)you stay with her and try to make your relationship better,but ask yourself this....if you do break up with her and she meets another man and falls in love with him,could you really handle that? Can you imagine life without her? Think hard before you decide.Good luck.
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