A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello:)Before I tell you my problem let me tell you a bit of background, I've been with my boyfriend X for a year now, however when we first met when I was already in a relationship, but he confessed his love for me which made things a little awkward as friends, and I felt something for him, but of course I was in a relationship so nothing happened apart from being friends. Anyway, we stayed close friends, although as time went on we grew more apart as I grew closer to my boyfriend at the time.My then boyfriend and I had problems, and at that time of being on and off with each other X moved away to try and get over me. I was devastated, I broke up with my boyfriend because it wasn't fair on either of us the way we were with each other. And whilst X was away I had time to be on my own and think of what I wanted, and that was X !I know it sounds like a bit of a Jeremy Kyle show thing going on, but it was just one of those cases of, you don't know what you had until it was gone!X and I have now been together for a year. It was a bit scary at first because we both had trust issues, and kept bringing up silly things from the past, but I like to think we have got over that bit now.A couple of months ago I started feeling a bit down, feeling like I wasn't appreciated, I started a bit self-conscious and like I wasn't good enough. I felt like when he first met me he adored me, and when we first got together he was so lovely, and don't get me wrong he still is, but I want to feel special. I'm not saying he has to go out and buy me loads of expensive things and take me out every night, in fact, quite the opposite, it's more about the way he looks and speaks to me, but also a hint of him not taking me out and all that.I spoke to him about it, but everything either came out totally wrong, or he was just so defensive and didn't accept anything I would say. Which then led to more arguments and me being upset because of the way he was reacting to me!!And now.. I have calmed down about and not having a go at him, but I feel like the spark has gone a bit, I know how much he loves me, and everyone always says how they've never seen anyone love someone as much as he loves me, but then why don't I feel it sometimes?I'm sorry this is long winded and I thank you in advance for anyone who has taken the time to read this and reply!I guess I'm just wondering if anyone else out there has gone through this, and I know loads of people will have, but can we get through this?And I don't mean, get through the arguing then just put up with each other,will this pass? Or should I rethink being with him?THANKYOU!! xxx
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female
reader, elaykelll +, writes (12 February 2013):
Sounds like too much damage has been done... but its always possible to rekindle that.. IF!!!! he wants to... and it sound s like he doesn't as much as you do.
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