A
female
,
anonymous
writes: I feel like my marriage is doomed! My husband has always had a "strong" personality but since our wedding 2 months ago he has been horrible. I can be in a perfectly calm, happy mood and never know what's going to set him off and get him yelling at me over trivial things. It's very upsetting to think this is how it's going to be for the rest of my life. Example: At Christmas when we were heading out to do some shopping I asked him if he had thought of anything for his brother. Simple question. I expected him to say "Oh yeah, we need to put him on the list" (since we bought everyone's gift but his) but instead, he immediately started flipping out, telling me I was trying to "plan the whole day" around his brother's gift shopping. (Huh?....) Tonight while he was out running errands, I called and he seemed fine. I remembered leaving my favorite sunglasses in the car he was using. So I made a simple statement, "Hey when you get home, can you grab my sunglasses and bring them in for me?"....I didn't expect him to start screaming at me and saying "Well I can't do anything about that until I get home." Well duh! That's why I'm asking you to bring them in when you get home. I'm mean it's so simple, but it would save me from putting on my coat, going back out to the car, unlocking it, getting the sunglasses etc. How many times do I make extra stops on my way home when he calls me? How many times has he called me and said, "Hey I left my briefcase in your car, can you grab it when you get home and bring into the house?" I think it was teamwork for us to do stuff for each other. I didn't realize it was going to be such an ordeal! I don't understand why all our conversations here lately end up like this. And when I ask later if everything is okay, or is he unhappy he just shrugs it off like, "Don't bug me about your stupid sunglasses". That just seems so inconsiderate. And I'm thinking how many times, do I stop on my way home from work to grab something for him? Or that phone call from him, "Hey I left my briefcase in your car, can you bring it in when you get home?" My answer is, "Sure." Why can't he do the same?????
View related questions:
christmas, wedding Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2011): this is tough....i notice sometimes when people get married things turn bad...people feel stuck and controlled...it shouldnt be like that but it gets that way...try talking to him tell him how you feel, you guys made a life long commitment...maybe something else is going on....he could just be deppressed and acting out who knows...is there more to the story?
A
male
reader, olderthandirt +, writes (4 January 2011):
Doesn't sound like a "strong" personality to me. He sounds like a classic P____k. I think you may be right on the "doomed " part be careful upon your exit strategy.
...............................
A
male
reader, Welsh Uncle Dave +, writes (4 January 2011):
I obviously don't have the answer to what is going on as I don't know either of you, but something is definitely up in my opinion.
I would say to try an talk to him, but given by what you've said already you might have difficulty doing so.
Sorry I can't offer any more advice
...............................
|