| A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I am in a relationship right now going on 7 months. I am 21 and she is 17 and a senior in high school. I see her every single day. When i don't work I am at her house. When I am at work , She comes up and is with me the entire time because my job allows this as I work kinda as security. Now, I do like to see her all the time, but im just wondering if maybe its not too healthy seeing each other every day. I love her but I feel kind of bored seeing her all the time.The problem here is this: I have a lot of trouble trusting people. Before this I was in a 2 and a half year relationship and i was lied to and we had a lot of problems and ended up breaking up. My current girlfriend lied to me once, and it wasnt even anythign big, and now I worry about her lying to me all of the time. I ask her who she has talked to all the time, she doesnt go out very much because im worried something might happen, and she has lost friends, as i have. I feel like I am too controlling and I dont know what to do to help. I just need some advice please.Thank you
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female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (8 December 2006):
 Good for you, recognizing that this relationship is starting to get a little unhealthy.
It's true, spending 24/7 together isn't really healthy. You guys need time to yourself to do your own thing, not to mention, you need time to miss each other.
When you're in a relationship, your world should get BIGGER not SMALLER. And especially at her age, she's in high school. She should be having fun with her friends right now. I'm not suggesting you break up, but I'm saying you really need to loosen this relationship up.
You need to let her go out - she's young! She should be having fun with her friends! If you two truly love each other, you don't need to know who she's been talking to and where she's been- just trust she's coming home to you.
It sounds like you're a good guy with room to make changes.
If it proves too hard, maybe you should check out a therapist just to talk about these trust issues. It sounds like it is really effecting you, and that's gotta be hard.
Good luck!
xxIndia
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