A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have a problem I want to address with my boyfriend about our love-making. We are in a serious relationship, and he is a wonderful lover in so many ways. However, when we are doing sexual things to each other he might mention things that I consider inappropriate like what we had watched on tv. I don't think he is using it as a method of delaying orgasm on his part, but more that he doesn't like the quietness of our love-making (we have to be quiet because he lives with his parents), so he feels compelled to say something. In fact, the other day he switched the TV on in the middle!!! I know he wouldn't do anything to hurt my feelings and I am sure he doesn't realise that it is killing the mood for me, but I am definitely going to have to say something. I really get the impression he feels awkward and needs some noise of some sort!!! We have both been hurt quite badly in previous relationships, and neither of us seems to be saying how we feel about things very much although I know we have plenty of time for that. I think we are both a bit scared. How do I overcome this and acheive greater intimacy with him, and why is my boyfriend making these random comments during love-making about everyday things? I don't want him to feel awkward so how do I encourage him to open up and what sort of things could I say to him during love-making???
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female
reader, BlueEyedAngel  +, writes (11 September 2007):
 i agree with the other answer whisper in his ear and just enjoy each other. maybe suggest to go to a nice motel or resort for a night and really enjoy each others love making
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2007): Yes, he may not like the quietness; actually, the noise(human:-) is usually considered a turn on by men, but since his parents could hear you he probably switched the TV on to cover up the "delinquency" in your bedroom. You shouldn't have problems with that. I've seen cases of men being unsatisfied with the woman talking during intimacy, because she's supposed to be too "impressed" to be able to talk. Oh, old joke. Don't make a problem out of that please, if he makes comments on random everyday things. Maybe... he's usually talkative? or maybe he's a bit nervous when you're around (plus for you) and some manifest by being loquacious when they're nervous. The talk doesn't need to spoil the fun when he's "a wonderful lover in so many ways." However, if it develops into full stories and you dislike it, simply take over, whisper in his ear "let's not talk" and...
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